JONNY declares his love for Chris. Chris doesn't like that, until he realizes that he's also in love with Jonny. Then he's like, "Oh, shirt!"
It's a slash fic!
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Once upon a time, there was a boy called Jonny Buckland. He liked to wear hats, particularly this one green hat. He played guitar very well, better than almost anyone else in the whole world. He was sweet, kind, and an all around lovely person. His best friend was a boy called Chris Martin. Chris was not as perfect as Jonny. His hair often grew out too long, resulting in what some people would call an afro. He sang well enough, but he was horrible at writing songs. He was a paranoid, nerdy, hyperactive loser. Jonny would always tell him otherwise, but he never believed him. Jonny was absolute perfection in his eyes, and he'd never be able to live up to that. Of course, he was quite clearly in love with Jonny.
There was one point in time when Jonny was in love with him, too, but Chris was too blind to see it. He missed his chance, and when he finally realized what he could have had, it was far too late. They'd been friends for years, and they shared a very strong connection. They could always tell what the other was thinking, except for when it came to their feelings about each other. For some reason, it wasn't as obvious to them as it was to the rest of the world.
One day, Jonny had had enough. He let Chris know exactly how he felt. Unfortunately, Chris didn't react in the way he'd wanted, so Jonny packed up and left. When he left, Chris felt absolutely miserable, and Jonny no doubt felt the same. It was all over, though, and it seemed there was nothing either one of them could do to fix it. Until now.
My name is Chris, and I'm here to tell our story in an attempt to persuade Jonny to forgive me. It probably won't work, but it's worth a shot.
There was one point in time when Jonny was in love with him, too, but Chris was too blind to see it. He missed his chance, and when he finally realized what he could have had, it was far too late. They'd been friends for years, and they shared a very strong connection. They could always tell what the other was thinking, except for when it came to their feelings about each other. For some reason, it wasn't as obvious to them as it was to the rest of the world.
One day, Jonny had had enough. He let Chris know exactly how he felt. Unfortunately, Chris didn't react in the way he'd wanted, so Jonny packed up and left. When he left, Chris felt absolutely miserable, and Jonny no doubt felt the same. It was all over, though, and it seemed there was nothing either one of them could do to fix it. Until now.
My name is Chris, and I'm here to tell our story in an attempt to persuade Jonny to forgive me. It probably won't work, but it's worth a shot.
-
It was a rainy day. Guy was off visiting some of his relatives in Scotland. We were stuck inside, Jonny, Will, and I, and we were trying to find something to do. No matter how many ideas we came up with, we couldn't agree on anything. Watch telly? Nah, nothing good is on on Saturdays. Play Monopoly? No, Chris always cheats. I don't actually, but Will thinks I do, and whatever he thinks is fact according to him.
“There's got to be something,” I sighed.
“Maybe we should all just take a nap,” Will suggested.
“You can do that if you want. I'm not tired.”
“You're never tired, Chris. You're like a giant ball of energy,” Jonny said. “I have no idea how you do that.”
“Magic.” The room went silent. I think maybe we were all trying to come up with more ideas, even though we probably wouldn't agree.
“You know what we could do?” Jonny asked.
“What?”
“Play truth or dare.”
“Truth or dare? Really? Are we teenagers again?” Will asked.
“Actually, that doesn't sound like such a bad idea,” I said.
“Well, you two can play, and I'll take a nap. How does that sound?”
“Whatever,” Jonny said. “If you don't mind, I don't mind.”
“Do you mind, Chris?”
“I guess not.”
“Then it's settled,” Will said. “I'll go in the other room and nap, and you two can play your little game in here.” He stood up and left the room. I looked over at Jonny. He was staring out the window, a nervous expression on his face.
“I didn't think he'd actually leave,” he said.
“Did you not want him to leave? We can call him back in here, you know.”
“No, it's OK. It's just that... well, I don't really want to play truth-or-dare.”
“Oh. Well, we don't have to... What did you want to do?” I asked.
“We could just talk. Talking's nice.”
“Sure. Uh, what do you want to talk about? Anything in mind?” He sat silently for a few moments, still staring nervously out the window.
“I love... the rain. The rain is nice. I think so, anyway.”
“Rain. Rain is... good, I guess.”
“It's beautiful. One of the most amazing things I've ever seen, besides... well, besides nothing, really. I guess it's the most amazing thing I've ever seen. Uh... the blueish-ness of the water, it reminds me of... uh, well, it's pretty.”
“What does it remind you of?”
“Nothing,” he mumbled.
“Oh, come on,” I said. “You can tell me. What does it remind you of?” He turned to me, his expression changing from nervous to frightened. He opened his mouth, about to say something, but just turned back to the window.
“Your eyes,” he muttered. I couldn't believe he'd just said that, although I wasn't sure he really did. I walked over to where he was sitting and took the seat next to him.
“What?”
“Chris,” he began, his voice cracking a bit. “Would you hate me if I told you that I love you?”
“There's got to be something,” I sighed.
“Maybe we should all just take a nap,” Will suggested.
“You can do that if you want. I'm not tired.”
“You're never tired, Chris. You're like a giant ball of energy,” Jonny said. “I have no idea how you do that.”
“Magic.” The room went silent. I think maybe we were all trying to come up with more ideas, even though we probably wouldn't agree.
“You know what we could do?” Jonny asked.
“What?”
“Play truth or dare.”
“Truth or dare? Really? Are we teenagers again?” Will asked.
“Actually, that doesn't sound like such a bad idea,” I said.
“Well, you two can play, and I'll take a nap. How does that sound?”
“Whatever,” Jonny said. “If you don't mind, I don't mind.”
“Do you mind, Chris?”
“I guess not.”
“Then it's settled,” Will said. “I'll go in the other room and nap, and you two can play your little game in here.” He stood up and left the room. I looked over at Jonny. He was staring out the window, a nervous expression on his face.
“I didn't think he'd actually leave,” he said.
“Did you not want him to leave? We can call him back in here, you know.”
“No, it's OK. It's just that... well, I don't really want to play truth-or-dare.”
“Oh. Well, we don't have to... What did you want to do?” I asked.
“We could just talk. Talking's nice.”
“Sure. Uh, what do you want to talk about? Anything in mind?” He sat silently for a few moments, still staring nervously out the window.
“I love... the rain. The rain is nice. I think so, anyway.”
“Rain. Rain is... good, I guess.”
“It's beautiful. One of the most amazing things I've ever seen, besides... well, besides nothing, really. I guess it's the most amazing thing I've ever seen. Uh... the blueish-ness of the water, it reminds me of... uh, well, it's pretty.”
“What does it remind you of?”
“Nothing,” he mumbled.
“Oh, come on,” I said. “You can tell me. What does it remind you of?” He turned to me, his expression changing from nervous to frightened. He opened his mouth, about to say something, but just turned back to the window.
“Your eyes,” he muttered. I couldn't believe he'd just said that, although I wasn't sure he really did. I walked over to where he was sitting and took the seat next to him.
“What?”
“Chris,” he began, his voice cracking a bit. “Would you hate me if I told you that I love you?”
-
“You... you... love me?” I didn't know what to think. My mind was racing, trying to find something that hinted at his confession. How could I have not seen this coming? My best friend, the person I spend all my time with, was in love with me, and I didn't even notice? It was preposterous.
There was one memory I had that maybe hinted at it. All four of us were in rehearsal. It wasn't an especially good day for any of us. Jonny kept breaking the strings on his guitar, Guy had lost his camera, Will didn't get a lot of sleep the night before, and no matter how hard I tried, nothing I did that day came out right. Any song I tried to sing, any chord I tried to play... even the sandwich I made for lunch was horrible.
Eventually, I ended up getting punched in the face by Will, who rightly did so after I basically told him he was better off... well, I'll spare you the details. It wasn't pretty, but I deserved it. I knew I deserved it even then, and everyone else knew, too. Will, obviously fed up with me, stormed out of the Bakery, and Guy soon followed. Jonny stayed with me, though, despite me being an uptight jerk the whole day. I think I'd yelled at him a few times as well. But he just stayed there with me and made sure I was OK. He got me some ice and everything. I suppose that could have been a sign... but wouldn't I have thought of that sooner?
“No... no, that's not... that's not possible,” I said.
“What?”
“You can't be in love with me... there's no...” He stood up and started to walk away. “Where are you going?”
“Home,” he said, reaching for the door. “Clearly, I've gotten my answer from you.”
“Jonny, don't leave.”
“I don't want to talk to you anymore, Chris.” He left. I remained in my seat, staring at the wall. I couldn't believe anything that had just happened. I even tried to convince myself I was dreaming, or hallucinating, or something. After what seemed like ages, Will walked back in the room.
“Hey,” he said.
“I thought you were taking a nap.”
“I guess I wasn't as tired as I thought... Where's Jonny?”
“He went home.”
“Why?”
“He, uh... he had to do something.”
“Oh... Is everything OK?” he asked. “You look a bit... shocked.”
“No, I'm fine. I just found out that Miley Cyrus is Hannah Montana is all. Didn't see that coming.”
“I know you're lying, but whatever.”
“Will... did you know?”
“Know what?”
“That Jonny is in love with me?”
“Yeah, of course. And you're in love with him, too, right?”
“What?”
“You're in love with him, too. It's kinda obvious.”
“Will, don't be ridiculous.”
“I'm not being ridiculous. You don't have to worry, it's not like I think you're disgusting or something. Wait...” he said. “Is that why he left?” I nodded.
“He told me, but I didn't believe him... Will, if it's true, why didn't I see it coming?”
“No offense, mate, but you're not exactly the most intelligent person in the world. I mean, you're not even aware that you're in love with him.”
“I'm not in love with him!” I shouted. I wasn't in love with Jonny... was I? Not noticing that your best friend is in love with you is one thing, but not knowing that you're in love with someone? That's impossible.
“Yeah, Chris, you are. Deal with it. It's not like there's anything wrong with Jonny anyway.”
“No, I know there's nothing wrong with Jonny. He's absolutely perfect. I'm just saying that...” I couldn't finish my sentence. The words hit me like a train. Will must have noticed, because he smirked. “Perfect...”
“Right, you're not in love with him at all,” he said sarcastically.
“Shit.”
There was one memory I had that maybe hinted at it. All four of us were in rehearsal. It wasn't an especially good day for any of us. Jonny kept breaking the strings on his guitar, Guy had lost his camera, Will didn't get a lot of sleep the night before, and no matter how hard I tried, nothing I did that day came out right. Any song I tried to sing, any chord I tried to play... even the sandwich I made for lunch was horrible.
Eventually, I ended up getting punched in the face by Will, who rightly did so after I basically told him he was better off... well, I'll spare you the details. It wasn't pretty, but I deserved it. I knew I deserved it even then, and everyone else knew, too. Will, obviously fed up with me, stormed out of the Bakery, and Guy soon followed. Jonny stayed with me, though, despite me being an uptight jerk the whole day. I think I'd yelled at him a few times as well. But he just stayed there with me and made sure I was OK. He got me some ice and everything. I suppose that could have been a sign... but wouldn't I have thought of that sooner?
“No... no, that's not... that's not possible,” I said.
“What?”
“You can't be in love with me... there's no...” He stood up and started to walk away. “Where are you going?”
“Home,” he said, reaching for the door. “Clearly, I've gotten my answer from you.”
“Jonny, don't leave.”
“I don't want to talk to you anymore, Chris.” He left. I remained in my seat, staring at the wall. I couldn't believe anything that had just happened. I even tried to convince myself I was dreaming, or hallucinating, or something. After what seemed like ages, Will walked back in the room.
“Hey,” he said.
“I thought you were taking a nap.”
“I guess I wasn't as tired as I thought... Where's Jonny?”
“He went home.”
“Why?”
“He, uh... he had to do something.”
“Oh... Is everything OK?” he asked. “You look a bit... shocked.”
“No, I'm fine. I just found out that Miley Cyrus is Hannah Montana is all. Didn't see that coming.”
“I know you're lying, but whatever.”
“Will... did you know?”
“Know what?”
“That Jonny is in love with me?”
“Yeah, of course. And you're in love with him, too, right?”
“What?”
“You're in love with him, too. It's kinda obvious.”
“Will, don't be ridiculous.”
“I'm not being ridiculous. You don't have to worry, it's not like I think you're disgusting or something. Wait...” he said. “Is that why he left?” I nodded.
“He told me, but I didn't believe him... Will, if it's true, why didn't I see it coming?”
“No offense, mate, but you're not exactly the most intelligent person in the world. I mean, you're not even aware that you're in love with him.”
“I'm not in love with him!” I shouted. I wasn't in love with Jonny... was I? Not noticing that your best friend is in love with you is one thing, but not knowing that you're in love with someone? That's impossible.
“Yeah, Chris, you are. Deal with it. It's not like there's anything wrong with Jonny anyway.”
“No, I know there's nothing wrong with Jonny. He's absolutely perfect. I'm just saying that...” I couldn't finish my sentence. The words hit me like a train. Will must have noticed, because he smirked. “Perfect...”
“Right, you're not in love with him at all,” he said sarcastically.
“Shit.”
-
I was in love with Jonny. It was so obvious- even more obvious than him being in love with me. If I ever wanted to go out for dinner or something with someone, I always thought of asking Jonny first. Whenever I was feeling depressed, I'd always call him to hear his relaxing voice. Sometimes he was the first thing I thought about when I woke up, and the last thing before I fell asleep. I felt like such an idiot. I was madly, deeply, undeniably in love with him. And it didn't matter anymore.
It didn't matter that he was the best friend I could have ever hoped for. It didn't matter that he could make me smile just by laughing. It didn't matter that I was nothing without him, because I messed it all up. He said he didn't want to talk to me anymore. But sometimes people say things they don't mean, right? I certainly did.
I drove over to his flat a few days after the whole fiasco. I decided that maybe if Jonny didn't want to talk to me, he'd at least let me talk to him. As I knocked on the door, I suddenly became very nervous. I had a feeling that nothing would be fixed by my being there, but I had to try.
“Who is it?” he asked.
“Jonny, I'm sorry.”
“Go away, Chris.”
“But I have to talk to you!”
“Go away, Chris.”
“No, please, Jonny, just please hear me out! Please?” The door opened.
“What?”
“I'm so sorry, Jonny. For the way I acted the other day. It was stupid, and selfish, and horrible, and... stupid.”
“Yep.”
“I love you, too, Jonny.”
“No, you don't.”
“Excuse me?”
“If you loved me, you wouldn't have acted that way.”
“So now you don't believe me? How is that any different from what I did?”
“I wasn't lying,” he said coldly.
“And neither am I! Jonny, I love you, I swear it!”
“Prove it.”
“How?”
“I don't know. You're clever, I'm sure you'll find a way. But until then... goodbye.” He closed the door. That was the last time I saw him. I went home and searched for hours for a way to prove to him that he was my everything. It was all I could think about for weeks.
So one day I decided to write. I wanted to write a song, but the words wouldn't come out. There was no melody playing in my head. Just emptiness. I still sat with a pen and paper, but I started writing a story instead. A story about us. And here it is.
Here it is for you, Jonny. It's not much, and it means basically nothing, but this is what happened. This is what happened from my point of view, and I can only hope that you'll see it and understand what happened. And maybe you'll forgive me for being so stupid. But if you don't, please know that everything I wrote came straight from my heart. I've never felt so strongly about anyone before, whether or not I realized it. Please forgive me, Jonny. I need you.
It didn't matter that he was the best friend I could have ever hoped for. It didn't matter that he could make me smile just by laughing. It didn't matter that I was nothing without him, because I messed it all up. He said he didn't want to talk to me anymore. But sometimes people say things they don't mean, right? I certainly did.
I drove over to his flat a few days after the whole fiasco. I decided that maybe if Jonny didn't want to talk to me, he'd at least let me talk to him. As I knocked on the door, I suddenly became very nervous. I had a feeling that nothing would be fixed by my being there, but I had to try.
“Who is it?” he asked.
“Jonny, I'm sorry.”
“Go away, Chris.”
“But I have to talk to you!”
“Go away, Chris.”
“No, please, Jonny, just please hear me out! Please?” The door opened.
“What?”
“I'm so sorry, Jonny. For the way I acted the other day. It was stupid, and selfish, and horrible, and... stupid.”
“Yep.”
“I love you, too, Jonny.”
“No, you don't.”
“Excuse me?”
“If you loved me, you wouldn't have acted that way.”
“So now you don't believe me? How is that any different from what I did?”
“I wasn't lying,” he said coldly.
“And neither am I! Jonny, I love you, I swear it!”
“Prove it.”
“How?”
“I don't know. You're clever, I'm sure you'll find a way. But until then... goodbye.” He closed the door. That was the last time I saw him. I went home and searched for hours for a way to prove to him that he was my everything. It was all I could think about for weeks.
So one day I decided to write. I wanted to write a song, but the words wouldn't come out. There was no melody playing in my head. Just emptiness. I still sat with a pen and paper, but I started writing a story instead. A story about us. And here it is.
Here it is for you, Jonny. It's not much, and it means basically nothing, but this is what happened. This is what happened from my point of view, and I can only hope that you'll see it and understand what happened. And maybe you'll forgive me for being so stupid. But if you don't, please know that everything I wrote came straight from my heart. I've never felt so strongly about anyone before, whether or not I realized it. Please forgive me, Jonny. I need you.
-
Jonny waited outside the door to Chris' apartment. He was holding a small stack of papers in his hand. Chris opened the door, shocked to find the man who was standing right in front of him.
“Jonny...”
“I read it,” Jonny said, lifting up the hand that was holding the papers.
“And?”
“It was horrible.”
“I've never written a story before,” Chris mumbled.
“No, your writing was fine. The ending was horrible.”
“What?”
“Love stories... they're not meant to have sad endings.”
“Does that mean you...”
“I forgive you, yes,” he smiled. Chris jumped forward and wrapped his arms tightly around Jonny's shoulders. “Oh, come on, like you thought I wasn't going to?”
“I did think you weren't going to. I wrote that several times, didn't I?”
“Yes, you did, but it was kind of a silly thing to think. I love you, remember?”
“Yeah, I remember,” Chris replied, closing his eyes and breathing in the magnificent scent of Jonny. “And I love you, too.”
“Jonny...”
“I read it,” Jonny said, lifting up the hand that was holding the papers.
“And?”
“It was horrible.”
“I've never written a story before,” Chris mumbled.
“No, your writing was fine. The ending was horrible.”
“What?”
“Love stories... they're not meant to have sad endings.”
“Does that mean you...”
“I forgive you, yes,” he smiled. Chris jumped forward and wrapped his arms tightly around Jonny's shoulders. “Oh, come on, like you thought I wasn't going to?”
“I did think you weren't going to. I wrote that several times, didn't I?”
“Yes, you did, but it was kind of a silly thing to think. I love you, remember?”
“Yeah, I remember,” Chris replied, closing his eyes and breathing in the magnificent scent of Jonny. “And I love you, too.”
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