I was searching for ages, throwing everything and anything I could find across the room in the hope that I would stumble upon it in the process. But by the time the floor was cleared, at least where I was standing, I still had no clue where it was.
I had it just last night, didn't I? Where could it have gone?
There was a knock on my door, but I ignored it because I hate them. I didn't want to talk to them, not ever again. Not after what they did to me.
It was right there, on the floor. Now it's not... I suppose that's representative, huh?
Digging through the pile on the other side of my room once more, I heard the door open. It could only open so far, stopped by the growing clutter as I continued to throw things.
“Chris, stop it.”
“Go away.”
“No. Now, stop acting like a child, and come back downstairs.”
“I'm not going anywhere, especially if you're there.”
She closed the door again, and I figured she had just given up and left. I looked around to see if I was right; I suppose I was, since she wasn't there.
She's only a year older than me, why didn't she understand? What was her problem?
When I still couldn't find it after the third time throwing everything, I collapsed on my bed. I couldn't take it anymore. I had lost the will to do anything, really.
He was being sent away, and I'd never see him again, probably... All because of her.
And the knock came again. I don't know why she even bothered, it's not like I was going to suddenly forgive her and answer the door with a bright smile.
But this time it wasn't her. And it took me quite a while, but I soon realized that it wasn't coming from the door, it was coming from the window.
I could barely see him through the reflection in the window, but as I lifted the pane his form grew clearer.
“Do you want to leave with me?” he asked in a low voice.
“Leave? Like.... leave?”
“Leave like let's get the hell out of here and never come back again.” Even in the dark his eyes were shining, boring holes through my soul and leaving me devastatingly weak. “Run away with me, Chris, please.”
“Yes, definitely.” He smiled at me and placed a hand on the window sill, which is when I noticed that he was shaking rather terribly. “You're shaking. Why are you shaking?”
“I'm just really scared. I don't even know where we'd stay or anything. I have some money, but it's not a lot, and I just... I'm scared.”
“Jonny, if we have to, we can sleep in the park. We'll make this work.”
“Yeah. It's all gonna be OK.” He nodded a few times, and I could tell he was trying to let the worry subside, even if it wouldn't. “Come on, get your stuff and let's go.”
I shook my head. “The only thing I own that I really care about is gone. I can't find it.”
“Are you sure? And, also, you should bring clothes with you, at least.”
“Oh, right.”
“Here,” he said, lifting something from the ground and shoving it through my window. It was a backpack. “Put some clothes in there, and whatever else you want to bring, if there is anything.”
“I'm not going to find it,” I told him, but I picked up the bag anyway. I went through my dresser, which had barely anything in it, and tossed about three outfits in there. I took one last quick look around my room; it wasn't anything fancy, it never had been. And I still didn't know where it was.
I had it last night, I know I did. It was on...
I turned to my bed and threw the pillows off. Jonny must have thought I was going crazy, because when I finally found it, I nearly jumped up and down. But I didn't because I knew it would have made too much noise.
I snatched the tiny stuffed lobster and handed Jonny his backpack through the window. He backed away a little to give me room to get out, which took some fancy work to do. But I managed to be out in the open air in a relatively short amount of time. I realized I left my light on, but I didn't really care. They'd find out soon enough.
Jonny and I started to sneak away from the house, walking as close to the fence as we could so the outside lights wouldn't hit us. Not that anyone would have been looking out of the windows.
Soon we were clear, strolling down the dark sidewalk rather inconspicuously. OK, it may have been weird to see two teenage boys walking down the sidewalk in the middle of the night, one wearing a backpack and the other holding a stuffed lobster, but other than that we were pretty normal.
“Wait, that's what you were looking for?” he asked me, pointing at the lobster.
“Yeah,” I innocently replied. “Don't you remember? When we went to the carnival, and you won it for me... and then I kissed you.”
“Yeah, I remember.” He took my hand and laced our fingers together. “I didn't realize it meant so much to you.”
“Almost as much as you.”
I felt invincible then, the cool air hitting my face and the awful suffocation of home far behind us. And the only thing that was up ahead was the wonderful prospect of being with Jonny and not worrying about what anyone else would think.
He didn't feel the same, and it was obvious.
“What's wrong, babe?”
He looked up at me with that frown, and my heart nearly broke. “I'm still scared. What if they find us? What if they try to separate us again?”
“Then we'll run away again,” I said. “Or wait another year until we're adults and they can't stop us. No matter what, Jonny, they can't stop us.”
-
“Chris, we need to have a talk.”
Her voice was as stern as it had been the night she told me about the accident. Except it didn't have that softness to it, probably because she didn't feel bad about the news this time.
“About what?”
“It's just that- I know you're good friends with him, but I don't think Jonny is a very good influence on you.”
“What?”
“Chris, ever since you started hanging around him more, you're rarely home on time, it seems like your grades haven't suffered much, but they are a bit lower, and well... I just don't think you should spend so much time with him.”
“But he's my best friend! He's my only friend-”
“You can make other friends,” she assured me with a smile. I didn't want other friends. “Friends who will benefit you in the end.”
And I couldn't tell her that he was more than just my friend, because she wouldn't understand. She never understood anything like she used to, not since the accident. She changed.
As I opened my eyes I felt the cool morning air hit me; the grass was wet with dew, but everything smelled so fresh, so clean. And I turned to see Jonny laying beside me, suddenly I was filled with inexplicable hope.
I thought he was still asleep, so I didn't bother him. But he opened one eyelid and whispered to me.
“Good morning.”
I snuggled up to him and smiled.
“Good morning. This is exciting, isn't it?”
“Yeah. Terrifying, but exciting.”
“What are we going to do today?”
“Well, I reckon we should try to find somewhere to go. I mean, sleeping in the park overnight was all right, but when it's only a few miles away from our houses, it doesn't really seem like a good place to run away to.”
“OK.”
I loved that Jonny was always taking charge. I loved that he was so adamant about us not getting caught. I loved him.
But I couldn't tell him that. I felt it for a long time, but I was afraid that I would scare him away if I said it.
Sometimes the way his green eyes sparkled when he looked at me made me wonder if he felt it, too. It was like our hearts were polar opposites, and they always clung to each other. It was always strongest when he held me in his arms; I could feel his heart beating in my own chest, keeping perfect time with mine.
“Actually, we should probably get going very soon, since it's light out now. I'm surprised we haven't already been found.”
“Sounds great.”
To be honest, I was only half listening to him, and half drowning in his scent. It added to the grass, to the feeling that we were starting fresh, new. Free.
We stood up and wiped the grass off our clothes. Then he took my hand again. He liked to do that a lot. I liked to let him.
“I think we should try to head out for the city. It's... well, quite a long distance from here, especially if we're only walking, but... I think it's our best shot.”
“What'll we do once we're in the city?”
He smiled at me, though I could tell it was a bit fake. “I have no idea.”
“Do you know anyone in the city?”
“No. And if I did, I'm not so sure they'd be keen on helping us out.”
All of this should have discouraged me, and I probably should have been as disheartened as Jonny was, but for some reason it did just the opposite.
“Then we can make our own way. Really start from the beginning.”
This time the smile was real. One hundred percent real. “Chris, I'm so glad I have you. You keep me sane, you know that?”
“I think you do the same for me, Jonnyboy.”
We began to walk along the side of the road in silence. It was light out, but it was still rather early; the sounds of nature around us filled the quiet peacefulness emitted by the world of sleeping people.
When we passed the school, it was almost weird. I stared at it, realizing that I would probably never go back there. That was fine with me.
“Jonny, do you want me to carry that?” I asked, pointing to the backpack with all of our stuff. Our stuff.
“No, it's fine,” he said with a reassuring smile.
“Jonny, how long do you think it'll take us to get to the city?”
“A few days, probably. I mean, it's not like we can walk nonstop.”
“I've never been to the city before. Once, maybe, but I don't really remember it.”
Jonny laughed his beautiful laugh. “It's OK, I've been there plenty of times- my dad works there. I know my way around and everything.”
“Good.” He put his arm around me, pulled me in, and kissed my cheek. Then something occurred to me. “Jonny, does your dad drive on this road?”
“Shit.” We shopped walking and stood off to the side of the road, Jonny alertly looking around. “We have to find another way, then.”
“Or maybe we could just wait. Hide. When does your dad usually leave?”
“I'm not sure... and I don't know what time it is now, anyway.” He looked around again, less alarmed and more certain. “We can't go to the city.”
“But, Jonny, we-”
“My dad works in the city. They'll find us.” He grabbed me by my shoulders and met my eyes. “I'm not bailing on you. But we need to go somewhere else. What's there for us in the city, anyway?”
“There's... Well, where are we gonna go, then?”
“It doesn't matter, let's just get out of here,” he quickly said.
We walked across the road and back down. The park was still quiet and empty when we went through it. Then we just kept walking, until the sun was nearly above us.
We had already passed by everything that looked familiar. This long road between our old town and the next was the only thing we could see for miles. Jonny thought maybe we'd made it halfway by then.
It was getting pretty hot out, especially since we were out in the open with very few trees nearby. It didn't look like anyone owned the land out there; it didn't even look like anyone lived around there for miles. I couldn't even remember the last house we'd gone by.
Jonny had stopped and was searching through the backpack. I stood beside him with nothing else to do. A minute later he pulled out a rather large bottle filled with water and handed it to me.
“It's probably not cold, but at least it's something.”
I told Jonny I loved him, but only in my mind. He zipped up the bag and swung it back on, then just stared at me. I suppose I'd been staring at him, too, while I was silently talking to him.
“Something wrong?”
“No, nothing's wrong.” I flashed him a smile and we were on our way again.
I didn't lie- nothing was wrong. One day there would come a time to tell him, but not today.
-
“Sit down, please.”
“What's wrong?”
“Just sit down.”
She was crying. The phone was resting beside her, and I guessed that she must have been told something to make her so upset.
“What's wrong?” I asked again.
“There was, um... there was an accident.”
Of course, my first thought was that my parents had gone out to dinner that night. But my little brother had also gone out with his friends.
“How bad was it?”
She shook her head and started crying again.
“Chris, we... w-we don't have parents anymore.”
Jonny and I were extremely tired. We'd been walking all day, and the sun had already gone down by this point. The moon gave us enough light to see where we were going, but we didn't want to go any further.
The open fields around us looked so inviting. It still wasn't obvious who they were owned by, but Jonny argued that since there weren't any trespassing signs, it would be all right for us to stay there until morning.
Jonny had thought of everything, I swear. Well, mostly everything. If it had been my idea to run away, I wouldn't have brought money, or clothes, or food, or anything like that. Jonny had brought all of that, and sure, we had to be really careful with how much we used so we wouldn't run out of food or water or money before we actually settled somewhere, but it was still something I wouldn't have even thought of.
Just one more thing to love about Jonny.
“There are too many stars, you know that?” Jonny said. We were laying in the grass a fair distance away from the road, side by side.
“I don't think so. I think they're wonderful.”
I stared up at the stars, but my eyes were starting to close. My breathing eventually became labored, though I was still conscious. Jonny must have noticed.
“Chris,” Jonny softly and sweetly called, “are you falling asleep?”
“Mm-hmm.”
Then I felt Jonny move as he rested his head against my chest. I tilted my head and buried my nose in his hair. Big surprise, he smelled like Jonny. But that is the best smell in the world.
“Goodnight, Chris.”
I think I slipped up and told Jonny I loved him, but luckily in my tiredness, nothing I said was coherent. At least, I was pretty sure it wasn't.
Jonny and I were still in the same position when morning came. I woke up and felt the warmth coming from his palm as it laid on my stomach. Then suddenly something occurred to me; there was a sound coming from somewhere very nearby that did not sound like any sort of nature...
I tried to lift my head without moving Jonny at all, which was a difficult and nearly impossible task. But I managed it in the end, and I saw the faint outline of a car in the foggy distance.
My heart sank; my mind seemed to channel Jonny and the first thing I thought was that they'd found us. We'd been caught, and now they would try to separate us again forever.
And while I thought that Jonny was still sleeping (I always think this, but he always seems to wake before I do), not long after I saw the car his soft voice spoke. “Chris, who is that?”
“I have no idea... Do you think they know we're here?” I was still just as afraid as Jonny, but I tried not to show it. “Maybe it's whoever owns this place.”
“I hope they don't mind that we stayed here.” I couldn't see his face, but I could tell that Jonny was looking rather anxious right about now. “There weren't any signs or anything.”
“It's fine, babe, I don't think they noticed us.”
I wasn't even sure if there were people outside of the car or even in the car, but the car was obviously running. Jonny sat up- actually, he flat out stood up and slowly started to walk over to the car. I watched him, sitting up myself, and hoped he knew what he was doing.
About halfway between where I was and the car, Jonny stopped. He craned his neck a bit and tried to peer inside. Then he turned around and shrugged.
“It doesn't look like anyone's in there.”
“But where could they be? I mean, there's not really any place around here to hide or anything.”
“I don't know.” Jonny quickly walked back over to where I was, and held out his hand to help me up. With his other hand he grabbed our backpack and then began to walk, pulling me along with him. “But I think we should leave now. You know, just in case.”
“OK.”
“It's just that I don't want to take any chances,” he said.
“OK.”
“I don't want to get caught. I don't want them to send me away from you.”
“Jonny!” I pulled back my hand a little to get his attention. He looked back at me with questioning eyes. “It's OK. I don't want that either.”
His eyes changed briefly and as chills ran down my back I thought I saw in them the very same thing I was hiding. But I quickly convinced myself that I was just imagining things. We started to walk again.
“Chris, I really thought we wouldn't see each other again.” He wasn't looking at me anymore, but his hand squeezed mine just a little bit harder. “I couldn't handle that.”
“Well, then, it's a good thing we ran away, huh?” I smiled.
Jonny glanced back at the car, then his pace seemed to quicken. I was worried, though more confused- until, of course, I heard the dull purr of the idle car roar as its engine revved. Then I started to walk faster, too.
-
“How are you feeling?”
“I don't know.” The pillow shoved up against my mouth muffled my voice, but I think she heard me well enough.
“There's someone at the door for you, if you're up for it.”
I blinked carelessly a few times, staring at the old photograph on my dresser. All of us, one big happy family, smiling. Not anymore.
“...Who?”
“Um... that one kid you hang out with all the time. Jonny?”
I pretty much knew that it was going to be him; I didn't have any other friends really, and certainly not ones who would want to see me. I did wonder precisely why Jonny was visiting, though it ultimately didn't matter to me.
“Tell him I'll be there in a minute.”
The car had just zoomed right past us, so the panic it set in only lasted momentarily. After that, we didn't come into contact with any other humans until the distant image of a new town came into view.
“Jonny...”
My voice was nearly a whisper, awed at such a wonderful sight. The town looked no fancier or more paradisiacal than any other I had seen, but I was just overcome with this feeling that we'd made it. Not that we really had any intention to settle in that town- Jonny thought it was still maybe too close to our old homes, and I agreed- but we had finally stumbled upon a mini society that we were totally unfamiliar with. To me, that was making it, and we did. We made it.
“Should we stop somewhere? It can't be that late, we've only been walking for an hour or so.”
“Do you want to stop?”
“Well, I mean, maybe we should stop somewhere and get, like, directions or something... I don't know where we'd get directions to...”
“We can get directions to the place where we can survive and not be bothered by people. I don't think it exists, but we could try,” I suggested.
“That sounds wonderful,” he said with a hint of a smile. I wanted to kiss him, and so I did. I kissed him on the cheek. It was nice to know that I didn't have to worry about it.
I think some people on the sidewalk gave us funny looks as we passed. I suppose it could be just because we were new faces, but it most likely had something to do with our intertwined hands. But people like that are just jerks.
“You boys aren't from around here, are you?” asked the clerk in the convenience store we stopped at. There was a sort of sneer in his tone.
“The next town over,” Jonny said. “Why, do we stick out or something?”
The man narrowed his eyes and scoffed a little. “What are you doing here then?”
“That's none of your concern. We're here because we want to be, though I think that's changing rather rapidly.” Jonny turned to me and said, “Maybe we should leave and find someplace else. This guy obviously doesn't want our business.”
“All right,” the man loudly said, “forget I asked. Can I help you boys with anything?”
Jonny sighed and tried to think. “We need a place to stay.”
“You're runaways, aren't you?” he asked with a knowing look. Upon seeing Jonny's expression turn to something resembling fear, he added, “I'm not gonna turn you in or anything, don't worry. But I'm not sure I can be of much help.”
“Sir, please, anywhere works,” I said. “We just need a place to stay.”
The man looked at me, ponderously. “There's a place a few miles south of here... No one owns it, kids stay there all the time. Adults, too.”
“Can you give us directions?” Jonny asked.
“Not hardly. Just walk in that direction,” he pointed across the store, though obviously he meant we had to walk outside, “and you'll hit it. You'll know when you're there.”
“All right. Thank you.”
Jonny left, pulling me along with him. We walked just like the man had told us to, once again passing by rude and judgmental pedestrians. This time I think some of the people even said things under their breath, no doubt cruel and ignorant. It sort of reminded me of her.
Man, she was pissed when she found out. I don't see why, since it's not like I'm her kid. And those people whose kid I used to be, they wouldn't have cared. But she cared.
So I liked Jonny, was it really that bad? And Jonny liked me, too. They should all have just been satisfied that we were both happy. I hadn't been happy in a long time before that.
Jonny must have sensed that something was wrong as my thoughts drifted aimlessly, because suddenly as we were strolling down the sidewalk he stopped. I stopped with him and looked at him with questioning eyes, wondering what the hell was going on.
Jonny didn't say anything, he just stared at me and observed for a while.
“What?” I finally asked.
“We'll make it. We can make this work.” I was a little surprised by Jonny's sudden confidence. Maybe an entire day without being found had persuaded him? “We won't ever have to deal with them again, OK? So don't be sad.”
My heart swelled, and I kissed him, but this time I did it for real. None of that cheek business, I went straight for his lips. I might have temporarily forgotten that we were surrounded by people, but it didn't matter much anyway.
It took another hour before we reached the place that seemed to fit the store clerk's description, as vague as that had been. There was a girl sitting on a large rock off to the side of the road, just staring at the air in front of her. She saw us.
“Newcomers!” she exclaimed, hopping off and running towards us. Her eyes scanned back and forth between Jonny and I. “Runaways, perfect.”
She ran off again, and Jonny and I stayed where we were, exchanging confused glances.
-
“What a big shot you are.”
Jonny was holding a small stuffed lobster in his hands. I'd just returned from the restrooms to find that apparently he'd won it at one of the games. I mocked him accordingly, then he handed it to me.
“Here,” he said.
I was rather touched by his generosity, but I couldn't take it.
“No, it's yours.”
“Actually, I won it for you.” He shoved the lobster into my hands forcefully. “I thought maybe it would cheer you up.”
Then suddenly I was overcome with emotion, and the only thing I could think to do was to kiss him. Which I did.
I didn't actually think about it. If I had, I might not have done it. The fear that would have presented itself had I thought beforehand briefly showed up, until Jonny kissed me back. Then I knew I had nothing to worry about.
The crazy girl returned shortly after she had disappeared. She was alone, but she brought Jonny and I to a rather wooded area where several other kids were. They looked to be about our age, more or less.
“Hey, everyone!” she called out, and the kids all looked up at her. “It's time to meet the newbies.”
Jonny glanced at me and bit his lip to stifle a giggle. Newbies, really? Maybe they were younger than us.
“What are your names?” one of the kids asked.
“Jonny.”
“Chris.”
“You're going to stay here?”
“We were planning on it,” Jonny said.
“All right, well, no need to get snarky, eh? I was just asking.”
“That's Timothy,” the crazy girl said to us. “He was one of the first here.”
“How long have you all been here?”
“I've been here for three years. Scratch,” she pointed to one of the kids, “has been here four. Lily's going on six months. Oh, and Timmy. He was born here.”
I didn't mean to laugh, it just kinda came out. Then when everyone looked at me I had to justify it. “Scratch? That's not your real name, is it?”
“He had the chicken pox when he came here,” Crazy explained to us.
“Oh. Well, I guess that makes sense.”
“And he doesn't talk, so we don't know his real name. Anyway, Timmy's been here his whole life.”
“My mum owns this place,” Timothy said.
“I thought no one owned it?”
“No one thinks anyone owns it. But my mum does. She doesn't care, though. This place is basically an outdoor shelter, as weird as that sounds.”
“We're very glad to have you here,” the girl who appeared to be Lily said.
“She's only saying that because it means she's not the newest anymore,” Timothy said. “Newbies don't get the same privileges as everyone else.”
“Like what?” Jonny asked.
“You're last for everything,” Lily replied, “and you're lucky if you get food seven days a week.” I hadn't really noticed until then just how skinny she was compared to the others. “But it's worth it,” she added.
“Listen, guys, I'll take you to your spot. You can set your stuff down, then we'll come back here and... talk.” Timothy shot a dark look at Crazy, who then seemed to withdraw into herself.
As we walked by, following Timothy, I asked Crazy what her name was.
“Felicia,” she said.
“Nice to meet you, Felicia.”
“I wouldn't be so sure.” I was going to say something in return, but I had to leave.
Timothy led us to a very nearby location, a small open patch of grass completely encircled by threes. That was our spot. Our spot. I was so happy.
“Your mum really doesn't mind people staying here like this?” I asked.
“Nah, she loves it. She loves knowing that she can help people out by giving them a place to stay when they need it.”
“We certainly appreciate it,” Jonny said. He dropped our bag on the grass and we began to return to the others.
When we came back, Felicia was talking to Lily. As soon as she saw us, she instantly stopped. She walked over to Timothy, hesitantly, and then the two went off God knows where.
Jonny and I sat with Lily. She was really skinny. It was almost scary. I asked her if she thought we'd end up that skinny; she said yes.
“Who knows when the next people will come? Until then you're stuck being the new kids. You should have seen Scratch when I got here...”
Something about that sounded off, but I couldn't put my finger on it. It didn't matter much to me at that moment, anyway.
Everything was quiet until Timothy and Felicia returned. Felicia looked a lot better than she did before. Even a little devious, if you ask me.
Timothy stopped in front of us. Felicia gave him a wink as she walked on and stood beside the other two.
“You're clear for today. We'll give you food, and you can just chill here. Tomorrow, I'll show you around and instruct you on what you'll be doing to earn your living. We're generous, but you've got to work. Help out, you know?”
“That's fine,” Jonny said. “Thank you, again.”
“It's not a problem,” Timothy replied, then he winked. But it almost seemed like he was looking at Felicia when he winked. I started to suspect that there was maybe something between them. But who am I to judge?
“Have a seat over here, guys!” Felicia yelled to us. Jonny and I sat down with the others, across from Felicia and Lily. For a minute or two I had trouble finding exactly where Scratch was sitting, but I soon realized that he was sitting almost behind me. Timothy seemed to have disappeared completely, though. “Tell us more about yourselves.”
-
Jonny walked me back to my house. We were both silent, but I could hear Jonny's brain whirring beside me.
“Are we together now?” he suddenly asked. The question made me smile.
“Sure.”
“...Are we gonna tell anyone?”
He stopped in the middle of the sidewalk; I stood in front of him. His bright green eyes were glistening in the light of the setting sun.
“Well, I mean, we could, or we don't have to.”
“It's just-” he started fiddling with his hands, “I'm not sure my parents will like it.”
“Oh, right.” I smiled and grabbed his hand, lacing our fingers together. “We don't have to tell anyone.”
“All right.”
We started again, and for some reason we were moving slower than before. I don't think it was conscious for me, but maybe Jonny did it on purpose so we could spend more time together.
That was quite all right with me.
“This is where you'll be working,” Timothy said to me. He was showing off a room the size of a bed. There were no windows and barely any light from the overhead lamp.
“Looks kinda small.” What little I'd already seen of the house had been comprised of rather enormous rooms; in comparison, this was like a broom closet. Maybe it was.
“Well, you're only one person. You won't need that much space.”
“What'll I be doing?”
“Filing. Sorting. Filling things out. Not difficult work, really.” Timothy stared blankly into the room, but I thought I saw him starting to smile. “Come on, I'll show you two the rest of the house.”
Timothy instantly took off down the hallway, and Jonny and I followed him.
“My mum will be so pleased that you guys are here,” he yelled back to us. “The more we have, the more we can get done, and the more we can help others.” He stopped in front of another door and spun around. “It's not easy to keep this going, you know.”
He opened the door revealing a large room, blindingly white from the stark ivory décor and a huge window letting in the entire sun. It may have actually fit in that room.
“Whoa,” Jonny said. “Fancy.”
There was an oak desk lined up with the center of the window, smiling at us and inviting us in for a drink.
“This is my room,” Timothy excitedly explained. “One of them, at least.”
“How many rooms do you have?” Jonny asked.
Timothy thought for a moment, then laughed. “I can't even remember!”
“That must be nice,” I mumbled to Jonny. Then, to Timothy, I said, “Why do you have so many?”
“Different rooms for different things.” He proudly popped up the collar of his shirt, holding his chin up high. “I do a lot around here, y'know?”
“What's this room for?”
“Business-y type things. Stuff you'll be dealing with, but, of course, to a much lesser extent,” he pompously answered. “This is the room I frequent most often, so if you ever need anything, it's a safe bet to check here first.”
Timothy winked and left again after closing the door and removing the light that had spilled into the hallway.
After the tour was over, Timothy brought me back to the room I would work in, then told me to stay there and wait for him while he instructed Jonny on what he had to do. So I sat in the room and hummed to myself until he showed up again.
This time he was carrying a large stack of folders and a small laptop computer. He set them down on a desk that I hadn't actually noticed until just then and told me that all I needed to do was put the information into the computer. So easy.
Before I did any actual work, I snuck a peek at the stuff I had to enter into the computer. I couldn't understand any of it, though. It was all just a bunch of seemingly random numbers and letters.
So I began to type them up. After the first page was completed, I hit the enter bar, just as I'd been told. I glanced up at the screen and suddenly a bunch of words flashed across the screen. The tiny glimpse only left me with half a word: “-NEY.”
Well, it could have meant anything. I'm sure there are millions of ways to start that word, and even if I found them all it wouldn't have given the slightest clue as to what it actually was. Besides, maybe I was wrong, and it hadn't been those letters than appeared, but some other letters that my brain felt the need to replace.
So I just typed up the next page.
I tried to read the page that flashed after that, but it seemed to go by even quicker than the last, and the same for every page after that. Eventually I gave up and didn't bother to even look after the page was finished, except to make sure that I'd entered everything correctly.
I was very unsure of what to do once I'd finished. I looked around for a bit, mindlessly tapping my fingers on the desk. I missed Jonny.
Timothy was probably in his room. He never told me what to do when I was done, but I guessed that maybe I should see him and ask.
The only problem was that I couldn't remember exactly which door was his. I knew it wasn't too far from my room, but there were so many doors nearby that it just confused me. I walked what I thought was a distance near enough to the one we'd walked earlier, then picked one of the doors and reached out to knock.
“What are you doing?”
I spun around to see Timothy staring at me from across the hall. Apparently I'd chosen the wrong door. Figures.
“Uh... I typed all those things up, I was just coming to ask you what I should do next. But I couldn't remember which room was yours.”
“Don't go near that door again. That room is my mum's, and she doesn't appreciate visitors.” He was almost nasty about it. Geez, I didn't mean to pick the wrong door.
“Sorry.”
“It's fine, just stay away from it.” He nodded and gestured with his hands inviting me into the room. It was so bright that I was nearly squinting.
His door is on the left coming from my room, not the right. I had to remember that.
That is, of course, assuming that I hadn't forgotten which way my room was as well.
-
“Hey, dad, can I talk to you about something?”
His face was half-lit by the small lamp by his chair. He was reading some book, like he always did every evening.
“Sure, Chris. Have a seat.”
I walked over and sat down in the chair next to his. I was nervous, but my parents had always said that I could talk to them about anything if I ever needed to.
Parents always say that, but I don't think their kids actually talk to them. But I had a strong relationship with my parents, stronger than most.
“So, what is it that's bothering you?”
I figured it was best to just spit it out rather than stumble over some convoluted explanation.
“Well... I think I like one of my friends. You know, as more than a friend.”
“Oh, I've been there before. It's a very tricky situation. How close are you to this girl?”
I almost forgot that it wasn't exactly “usual” for me to like a guy. At least, most people would expect me to like a girl. I would have expected me to like a girl.
“He's not a girl. But we're pretty close.”
He leaned forward in his chair and thought for a bit. I was even more nervous now.
“I see. That makes it more difficult, eh? I assume this boy is straight as far as you know?”
“I think so, yeah. I mean, if he doesn't like me, that's OK. I just don't know how to act around him anymore.”
“Just be yourself. Don't worry about him finding out, because if he does and if he reacts badly, then he's not worth it. If he sticks around even though he doesn't like you, then you know you at least have a good friend.”
I smiled, though halfheartedly. I knew it would be nearly impossible to just be myself around Jonny, but I did appreciate my dad's understanding.
“You're not, like, upset or anything? That I like a boy, I mean.”
“Of course not,” he said. Then he laughed and added, “Listen, Chris, if we could choose who we're attracted to, I would not be married to your mother.”
Jonny never told me what work he did. I would always tell him about my day, and he just told me that he was too tired to talk himself, but he liked hearing me talk.
I thought that maybe Timothy had him working out in the yard, since I had seen Scratch doing yardwork as we went into the house the first day. Plus, Jonny was a very strong boy, and certainly would have been a great choice for manual labor and stuff like that.
It did make me a little sad to see him looking so tired. With the stuff I was doing, I didn't really use much energy, so it seemed like I was always awake for at least half the night. I would just watch Jonny sleep, not so peacefully, though. He always wore a worn expression, and sometimes in his sleep he would sigh. Whenever he did that I would scoot closer to him and wrap my arms around him.
Being away from home- at least, the house and people he'd known all his life- must have really taken a toll on him. I know it would have been hard for me, too, if I hadn't already lost my home beforehand. Well, I still had my brother and sister, but I hated her and I had never spent that much time with him.
The only person I had was Jonny. He was my home now.
But Jonny had people other than me, which I was fine with. He had his parents, who I guess he would have loved if they had accepted us. They were nice people, apart from that.
Even if he didn't like them, leaving a safe place like that to travel to somewhere you've never even heard of before is bound to be tough. At least, I was pretty sure that this was all the reason he was so sad.
One night I was watching Jonny sleep, and he started to whimper a bit. I reached out to pull him closer to me, but before I could he started twitching. A lot.
I panicked a little, but I decided it would be best to try to wake him. So I sat up and shook him a little, as gently as I could.
“Jonny... Jonny, wake up,” I whispered.
I don't know if what I did helped at all, but a few moments later his eyes flew open and he drew a sharp breath.
“Chris!”
He lunged forward- as best as a person laying down could lunge, anyway- and wrapped his arms around my abdomen, laying his head on my chest. I put one hand on his back and the other I used to smooth down his hair.
“It's OK, Jonny. It's OK, I'm here.”
“I love you.”
And there it was.
Jonny said it first. So now I had no reason not to, right? Other than the fact that I started to choke on my tears.
“I love you, too.”
It felt so nice to be able to say it freely without worrying about how he would react. When I told him that I had been afraid to say it because I wasn't sure that he'd feel the same, he reasoned that if he didn't, he wouldn't have run away with me. Jonny is such an intelligent boy.
And thus, for several weeks I went around thinking that that night, and what appeared to be his nightmare, were the cause of being so far from the life we had known before. It would still be difficult as we went on, but after a while this would be our new home, and everything would be fine.
Jonny returned to our spot around the same time that he usually did every other night. He looked tired, but not any more tired than I had seen him previously, or so I thought. I had a rather interesting story to tell him this night, involving a really strange conversation I'd had with Lily while we were on break- her lunch break, but just a regular break for me- and as he walked closer and the moonlight hit his face, I could see the circles under his eyes were darker than before.
I walked over to him and just stared for a while.
“Goodnight, Jonny.”
“You're not gonna talk to me?”
He sounded almost on the verge of tears, which broke my heart.
“I could, it's just that you look so tired.”
I reached my hand up to brush his cheek, but he flinched.
That's when I knew something else was wrong.
-
“Chris!!!”
I tried to look innocently at her, but of course it was no use. She'd seen us, obviously. The disgusted look on her face made me want to punch her.
“Yes?” I simply replied.
“Well, I thought I'd told you to get new friends. And now you're...”
“Dating Jonny,” I finished for her. “I know. We've been doing this for a while.”
She sneered at me, then turned to Jonny. I made a promise to myself at that moment that if she said or did anything to him, I wouldn't hold back.
“How would your parents feel if they knew about this, hmm?” she asked him. I really, really hate her.
Jonny didn't say anything, he just stared at the ground because he knew it wouldn't matter either way. She was going to tell his parents, and they were going to have a total fit.
Just to piss her off, I kissed him again.
“Jonny, what are they doing to you?”
My own voice was cracking now as I struggled to fight back the tears. Jonny just stared back at me.
“Are they hurting you?”
Jonny looked down to the ground, absentmindedly rubbing his arm. He was probably bruised under the jacket he donned.
“Maybe,” he replied, then proceeded to cry.
I brought him into my arms, and at first he cringed badly, but then he relaxed and rested his chin on my shoulder, burying his nose in my neck. I could feel his tears drip down his cheek and onto my own skin. They burned and made me shiver at the same time.
“Chris, you don't know what these people are like. Everything I do is wrong, and sometimes...”
Jonny's voice trailed off, and my mind picked up where it left off, racing through all the possible courses of finishing that sentence. None of them were pleasant.
“Chris, if anything bad happens, would you make sure to get yourself away from here? As safely as possible.”
Fear crashed over me like a wave and I held on tighter to Jonny's fragile frame.
“What do you mean 'if anything bad happens?' Why would you say that?”
“Because... sometimes I... I think they're trying to kill me.”
Everything went silent as Jonny held his breath, and my heart beat too fast for a bit.
“I know I sound paranoid, but it just seems like it, you know? And I want to be sure that you could take care of yourself if you have to. I don't want you to be hurt, too.”
“Jonny, if anything happens to you, I won't live.” Jonny pulled back some to meet my eyes. “I can promise you that.”
“Something's going to happen, unless we can... get out of here. These people aren't as they seem to be, Chris.”
“Tomorrow,” I said, “tomorrow we'll... leave. We'll find some other place to stay. Jonny, I love you.”
“I love you.” Jonny tried to smile, though it was obviously painful for him to do so. I tried to help him down to the ground, as it seemed that this particular day had been extraordinarily rough for him.
We slept as close as we could to each other, because while the days were hot, the nights were rather chilly still. At least with Jonny right next to me, I felt a little warmer. I didn't want to get too close to him, though, because I wasn't sure how hurt he was, and I didn't want to cause him any further pain.
The morning came too quickly, and as I noticed the pinkish-orange streak in the sky I knew that it would only be a matter of minutes before we were called to work.
“Jonny,” I quietly said, trying to wake him without having to touch him. He slowly opened his eyes and grunted in reply. “Jonny, maybe we should try to get out of here now, before they come for us.”
Jonny shook his head. “Chris, we don't have any of our stuff. They took it, remember?”
“Oh, yeah.”
I had completely forgotten that Timothy had offered to hold onto our bag for us, so that it wouldn't get ruined being outside. Thinking about it sent a chill down my spine, one that had absolutely nothing to do with the cool morning air. I was much less hopeful now, suspecting that preserving our things was not why Timothy had actually taken them.
How had I not realized what was going on around us? The more I thought about it, the more obvious the clues were. And as I saw Timothy walk towards our spot, holding his hand up to his mouth to call to us, I sighed and immediately stood up, leaving Jonny behind. I couldn't let Timothy know that I was aware of Jonny's injuries; I assumed that I wasn't supposed to know about the way he was being treated.
Just before I left, though, I whispered to him, “I'll find a way. Don't worry, Jonny, you won't have to put up with this much longer.”
For a few hours I worked as I usually did, mindlessly typing away a bunch of things I didn't understand. While doing so, I tried my hardest to come up with a plan. Bits of ideas formed in my head, but it wasn't until I had to leave to get more papers from Timothy that I knew what to do.
I knocked on his door, and he appeared within a few seconds. He let me into the office, and as he was turned around, busy filing through some cabinet in the corner, I decided to ask him:
“Timothy- uh, just out of curiosity- where exactly are you keeping our bags?”
Timothy stopped, and for a second I was afraid that he was going to react badly. But as he spun around I noticed he was smiling kindly, and I breathed a little sigh of relief.
“They're... in one of the other rooms. I can't remember which one right now, but I could have a look around for you if you like. Do you need anything right now?”
“No, it's fine. I was just wondering. But thanks, anyway.”
“Right.” He returned to the cabinet, but not for much longer. He handed me a new stack of papers to type, then announced that he had to be off to check whatever was going on outside. He left before I did, and so it was rather easy for me to do what suddenly came to my mind.
When he was what I figured to be a far enough distance away, I looked at the door in front of me and took a deep breath. Somehow I didn't really believe that his mother was in that room.
-
“What's going on?”
“I can't talk for very long,” he said.
“What's going on?” I repeated. I could hear Jonny sigh through the phone.
“I'm not supposed to be on the phone right now. My parents are sending me to some... I don't even know. They think it'll 'set me straight' or whatever.”
His words didn't even matter, really, except for 'sending,' because I was stuck on that bit. My mind practically froze, and I thought the rest of my body had, too, until I heard Jonny's voice again.
“Chris... say something, please. I can hear you breathing, I know you're there... Chris... I don't have much time.”
I wanted to say something, anything, but I couldn't get any sound to come out. After a few seconds I coughed, and my voice seemed to work again, but it was cracked and all over the place. “I-I don't know what to say.”
“Well, that's a start.” Jonny tried to laugh, but it was wrought with sadness and actually ended sounding more like a sob than anything else. Then, quietly, he added, “I'm going to miss you, Chris.”
“I don't want you to leave.”
“I don't want to leave, either. I- shit.” Even though the sound was muffled greatly by the phone, I could hear some rustling in Jonny's background. “I have to go now. Goodbye.”
“Bye-”
I was a little hesitant to look inside the room once the door was open. A little part of me was afraid that there would be some crazy lady inside itching to claw out my eyes. Oddly enough, the crazy lady in my imagination looked a little like my sister, but much older.
It was worse than that. Way worse.
I looked down at my feet as I walked inside. Almost instantly this weird smell was upon me, acting like a magnet and trying to lure the contents of my stomach onto the floor. Luckily, I hadn't eaten in days.
As the door clicked shut behind me, I brought my eyes up to look around. Then I almost threw up again.
The room was enormous, the floor stretched out as far as the eye could see. Rows upon rows of tables lined the walls and the space in between.
There were bags on every single table. Body bags. As I walked through I couldn't exactly tell if they were being... used, but it certainly looked like it.
I stopped at one of the bags and noticed a paper attached to it. At first it looked just like a regular sheet of paper, but as I stepped closer I realized that it had the same random numbers and letters as the papers I'd been typing up. I even recognized some of the sequences.
The silence in the room was utterly frightening, even causing me to shiver a little. I'd never felt so alone or afraid. It may have been the time in my life when I missed Jonny the most. All I wanted was to see him, to hold him, and then to get the hell away from this place.
I couldn't stay in there any longer. I'd completely forgotten about the supposed existence of Timothy's apparently fictional mother. Actually, I'd forgotten about almost everything that had happened. The only thing I could focus on was the grotesque contents of the room.
The door seemed so far away. Eventually I ran towards it, but I didn't reach it any quicker.
And the worst possible thing happened: the door wouldn't open. I turned the knob a million times, but it wouldn't even move a little. I was trapped. Completely trapped. There were no windows in the room, no way out except the locked door.
I thought about banging on the door and hoping that someone might fine me, but then I remembered that I wasn't supposed to be there anyway. If Timothy found out, he'd probably... Well, it wouldn't be good. And Jonny's voice rang in my ears:
“These people aren't as they seem to be, Chris.”
But I never imagined anything like this.
I slid to the floor and closed my eyes as I leaned back against the door. The smell was really starting to get to me.
Did Jonny know about all this? Was it just an inkling he had that something horrible was happening, or had he also stumbled upon this information?
I wasn't even sure what 'this' was, but I knew it was bad. I mean, any time anyone finds a room full of what appears to be dead human bodies, it can't be anything other than bad.
With nothing else to preoccupy me, my mind ran through all the possibilities of explanations for the horrors around me. Nothing really made much sense, until one idea popped up- organs. Every human had them, some humans needed extras. Say there was a place where people went to, people who wouldn't necessarily be missed by society. Surely they could disappear and it would be all right.
If Jonny had known, he would have told me. I certainly would have told him, if I could have found a way out of that goddamn room. The oxygen was starting to rapidly dissolve, and I didn't know how much time I could survive being in there.
With my eyes still closed, I pictured Jonny and the way he looked when I had last seem him. Why hadn't I thought to leave last night, when we still had plenty of time? Now there didn't seem to be any possible chance of that happening. It didn't even seem likely that I would ever leave that room.
Then I thought of what Jonny was doing now. No doubt he was working far harder than he should have, though not nearly enough for their standards. I almost cursed my parents for not giving me the DNA to be stronger like he was. Maybe then I would be the one suffering, and not him.
Suddenly I was struck with an awful thought; Jonny said he believed they were trying to kill him.
I couldn't breathe anymore, but not because of the odor that suffocated the room, or the lack of usable air. I was just crying too hard.
-
The ceiling was rather low, at least compared to the ceilings in the rest of the house. I don't think I'd ever experienced claustrophobia before I was in that room.
While I was lying on the floor, waiting until the room ran out of oxygen, I noticed that one of the ceiling tiles was a bit off. The others were a dark grey, but this one was a shade lighter.
I stood up and quickly looked around. There must have been some force on my side, because right next to the nearest table was a small stool.
The ceiling tile was loose, and it only took me a few seconds to life it off. I couldn't really see much of what was up there, but I felt around and one of the first tings my hand touched was a backpack strap. I figured it was a long shot, but I grabbed it and pulled whatever it was down.
It wasn't ours, which I had suspected, but that made me think that maybe ours was up there somewhere. I tried another time, and miraculously managed to pull down the familiar bag.
I threw the other bag back up and replaced the tile, then kicked the stool off to the side. I caught a whiff of the bag as I collapsed on the ground, and it smelled nearly as bad as the rest of the room. But I was glad to have it anyway.
With nothing else to do, I started to unzip the bag. The zipper was about halfway open when I started hearing voices.
“It'll be all right. You can just wait in here while I go deal with him,” Timothy said. At least, I thought it was him and I thought that was what he said; it was hard to hear through the walls. I figured whoever he was talking to would be led into his office, but then the doorknob beside me began to turn.
I quickly stood and stepped back. I nearly hit the stool but I tried to ignore it and hide in the shadowy corner as the door opened.
“Come on in,” Timothy said. It was definitely him. I was afraid that he'd seen me, but he sharply turned around and held the door open as another guy walked in– Jonny.
I don't remember thinking about doing it, I just did it. The stool was right there, so why not?
Then the next thing I knew I was standing over Timothy's unconscious body, holding the stool in my shaking hands.
Luckily I looked up, because the door was swinging shut.
“Jonny, the door!” He looked alertly at me, frozen with fear and confusion, so I shouted again. “Don't let it close!”
Jonny snapped out of his trance and slipped his hand into the narrow opening left between the door and the wall. He looked up at me and I sighed with relief. Everything seemed to slow down, but I suddenly realized we needed to get the hell out of there.
I dropped the stool and grabbed the bag, stepped over Timothy's body and opened the door, motioning for Jonny to leave first.
As we walked onto the front porch and I reveled in seeing the light of day, Jonny just sort of looked at me helplessly.
“Jonny, can you run?”
“I guess.”
“Then let's go.” I held my hand out to him. I think he didn't want me to see, but he kinda gripped the side of his leg. Then he grabbed my hand and we both started running like mad.
We must have been running for five minutes or so before we stopped on the road. I could still see the rock Felicia had been sitting on when we first arrived, but it was far in the distance.
Running away from the place you ran away to. How bizarre.
“I'm sorry.”
It was never something I thought Jonny would say at a time like this. I looked at him, and his bright green eyes seemed to frown at me.
“Why?”
“It was my idea to run away in the first place,” he said.
“I don't see why you should be sorry for that,” I said, and gave his hand a squeeze.
“Well, I mean, it's my fault we were almost killed. Or, I was, at least.”
“It's not your fault, Jonny.” He looked at me with disbelief, and I set my eyes on the path ahead of us. “But you were right earlier.”
“What do you mean?”
“That room we were in... Jonny, it was filled with bodies. Like, twenty or thirty dead bodies.”
Neither of us spoke again until we had reached that town we stumbled upon what seemed like ages ago. On one of the street corners we stopped to rest.
“Jonny, maybe we should go somewhere and get some food,” I suggested. He leaned back against the building we stood in front of and nodded.
“Good idea... but we don't have any money, do we?”
“Well, didn't you bring some? I got our bag back...” I turned a little and pointed to the backpack which I was currently sporting. Jonny reached around and searched through it briefly.
Not a minute later he was back to leaning, arms folded across his chest. “Looks like we've been robbed.”
I should have realized why they would take the bag in the first place. Of course they'd want to nick our money... but then I remembered something else. I swung the backpack off, nearly hitting Jonny, and almost tore it open in my franticness.
It was almost completely empty, and my heart raced as I dug through it. All that was in there was our clothes. Apparently they hadn't found those suitable enough to take.
But nowhere in there was a tiny stuffed lobster.
I didn't even realize I was crying until a few tears dropped onto my hand. Then I just felt stupid for crying, but I couldn't help it. Jonny must have noticed, because he pulled the bag away from me and tilted my head up so our eyes met.
“It's OK,” he softly said. “It's OK.”
He didn't even have to say it, because his eyes were telling enough, but hearing the words certainly made me feel better. Like the emotional mess that I was, I just sort of fell forward and wrapped my arms around him. He did the same, carefully encircling my neck.
“I love you, Chris.”
I was going to say it back, but the tone of Jonny's voice stopped me. Plus, I could tell that he was sort of cringing a little.
“What are you doing?” he asked as I backed away.
“I don't want to hurt you.”
Ironically, he looked at me with aching eyes and quietly said, “You won't.”
My heart broke like it had the night before, and I hugged Jonny again. But I still felt bad.
“Jonny-”
“Chris, I'm fine,” he said in a cracked voice.
“You're not fine, I can tell by your voice. You're clearly in pain.”
“I'm in pain, but you're not hurting me.”
“Well, I'm certainly not helping.”
“Yes, you are.” His hold seemed to tighten a little. “Don't let go.”
I breathed against his neck for a little while, then said, “I love you, too.”
For some reason I thought it was a little strange that no one seemed to be around. I let my eyes wander about the brick wall behind Jonny, and that's when I noticed the paper that made my heart skip a beat.
“Jonny...”
I pulled away again, but this time Jonny didn't stop me, maybe because he noted the seriousness in my tone.
“What is it?” he asked.
I didn't say anything, I just pointed behind him. He spun around and gasped a little when he saw it- a paper with our faces on it, and the word MISSING written in large, dark letters.
“W-well,” he began, “I mean, it's not surprising, is it, that they'd put up signs? I would if I was in their position...”
It was almost like he knew what I was going to say, but he allowed me to say it anyway. “Yeah, but Jonny, someone's gonna recognize us.”
And right on cue, someone just down the sidewalk shouted, “CHRIS!!”
-
It had been so long since I last saw him, and so much had happened in between that I'd nearly forgotten what my brother looked like. Of course, as soon as I saw him, I remembered.
“Oh, shit.” I don't think he was expecting such a friendly greeting as that. He just stared at us, a little confused, and then my sister came into view.
She paused momentarily, then kept walking past my brother and towards Jonny and myself. I couldn't tell what her expression was supposed to be, exactly; it looked like a weird combination of relief and anger. But when she stopped in front of us she just kinda seemed shocked.
“Chris, you...” Then I watched as she returned to her previous anger, this time much more intensified, if the severe slap on my arm I received from her proved anything. “What the hell is wrong with you?! Do you have any fucking idea what I went through the past few weeks?! I thought you were probably dead somewhere on the side of the road, Jesus Christ!!”
I shared a semi-knowing glance with Jonny, then calmly replied, “Do you have any idea what I went through?”
“No, of course not, and hmm, I wonder why? Maybe it had to do with the fact that you just suddenly disappeared and I had no fucking clue where you were. One day, I woke up and went to your room to talk to you, but there wasn't an answer. I figured maybe you were asleep, so I opened the door, and you weren't there. Then I searched the rest of the house and you still weren't there. Then Jonny's parents called, and said he wasn't 'round either.”
“I'll bet you had a lovely chat with them,” I quietly and bitterly said.
“We've been looking for you everywhere,” she said, ignoring my snide remark and gesturing to my brother. “I'm so glad that you're OK.”
She stepped forward and pulled me into an embrace, which I wasn't too happy about. I just stood there with my arms at my side until she seemed to get the point.
“Chris, why do you hate me?”
“Are you serious??”
Her eyes darted quickly to Jonny and back, and she sighed with a look of exasperation. “The past few months have been really rough for everyone... I thought we could all stick together, get through this together. But then you became really distant, and I was worried. And you were always going out with him,” she pointed at Jonny, “and... I just wanted you to stay with us. We're supposed to be a family.”
“What you did goes past family,” I told her, trying but failing to not raise my voice. “It affects Jonny, too, but you don't care about that, do you? All you care about is yourself.”
Her face changed, like she honestly hadn't realized the full consequences of her actions. I almost thought that she felt bad. “You took him away from us,” she said to Jonny. “I thought it was only fair I do the same to you.”
Jonny looked like he was uncomfortable being put in the middle of our argument, which is why I was thoroughly surprised by his response. “You didn't take him away from me. You tried. And I didn't take him away from you. I would never force Chris to do anything he didn't want to.”
She looked a little taken aback, and speechlessly she turned to me.
“I'm not going back with you,” I said.
“Where are you gonna go? What are you going to do? You can't survive on your own out here. You don't have money, you don't have shelter-”
“That didn't stop us before.”
Then suddenly Jonny's hand was on my arm, his lips brought up to my ear. “Chris, there's no point fighting it,” he whispered. “Remember what you said? We run away, or we wait a year until we're adults. No matter what, they can't stop us.”
I stared into Jonny's eyes and tried to suppress the feeling that he was right. I had said that, but now it didn't seem so easy to accept. So I tried the last option I had to hold onto him.
“Can Jonny come back and stay with us for a while?” I asked her. She looked a little blankly at me, so I turned to Jonny and added, “At least until you're feeling better.”
“What happened to you?” she asked.
“It's a long story,” he said.
She sighed deeply, then surprisingly nodded. “If you promise not to leave again like that... then he can stay. But only for a few days, then I have to let your parents know, Jonny.”
“Right.”
“They're really worried about you,” she said.
“I'm sure they are.” His hand was still on my arm, and his thumb brushed over my skin. “It's a shame they won't understand any of this.”
Jonny was fine getting into the car, though a few times he groaned in pain before he sat comfortably. I sat in the back with him and held his hand. When we arrived home I helped him out of the car, because it was a much more difficult process for him.
“You don't have to keep waiting on me,” he softly laughed as I walked around my bed and gave him a cup of tea. He was leaning back on my pillows, and after I gave him the tea- the third cup I'd made for him that night- I laid down beside him.
“But I like waiting on you. I want to help you.” I brought the back of my hand up and gently stroked his cheek. He turned his head and smiled at me.
“You know how you could help me?” he asked in a deep voice.
“How?”
He raised his eyebrows in slight distress and said, “Convince my parents that you're the most amazing person in the world. Then maybe they'll let me be with you.”
-
My sister asked again what had happened to Jonny. He was in my room, sleeping, and I wasn't sure if I should tell her without him being there. Plus, I didn't exactly know what they'd done to him. So I just told her the basics, and said that if she wanted to know more she could ask Jonny.
She looked horrified, which was not altogether surprising. Then she asked me to repeat what I'd said, and she grabbed a sheet of paper and scribbled stuff down as I rolled my eyes and told her again.
“Excuse me,” she quickly said, swooping out of the room and presumably in search of the phone. She was on there for a good hour or so talking to the police, quietly asking me questions every now and then. I'm not completely sure what happened to those kids, but I can only hope that they'll never see the outside world again, left only to rot in some awful prison somewhere.
Her anxiety seemed to increase with every day that Jonny stayed with us. On the fourth day, he and I were talking harmlessly while sitting on my bed when she came in and ordered me to leave. I did, but I stood right outside and pressed my ear against the closed door.
“I'm going to call your parents today,” she said. “I'll tell them that I found you both, and you're safe.”
“OK,” Jonny said, defeated. I wanted to burst into the room and hold him, but I controlled myself.
There was a short pause, then my sister said, “Chris is very fond of you. I want him to be happy. I just... Everything's so overwhelming, you know? I was supposed to be able to go out and start living my life, and instead I'm stuck taking care of two young boys.”
“I imagine it would be difficult,” Jonny said. “But you don't have to worry so much about Chris, he's a good person. And he's almost an adult himself.”
“You won't hurt him...” It was hard to tell if this was a statement or a question. Either way, there was no vocal response from Jonny, just my sister continuing on, “I'm sorry, but I have to call them.”
“Yeah.”
I sensed that she was going to be leaving relatively soon, so I backed away from the door and went down to another room. I waited until she walked by, then went back to Jonny. But I made a quick stop first.
“Thank you.”
She turned around and blinked a few times, looking at me with confusion. “Um... you're welcome.”
“I love him. Did you know that?”
She sympathetically sighed. “Chris, it's out of my hands now. I can't- If his parents decide that they don't want him to see you...”
“I know.” After a few seconds I turned to leave, but just before I did I said, “Go call them.”
Jonny looked up as I entered the room, and I got the feeling that he had been staring off into space beforehand. He smiled at me and I sat down next to him.
“Looks like today's our last day together,” he said with a bittersweet tone. “I'm guessing that I probably won't see much of you anymore.”
“Well, you never know,” I shrugged, though I knew it was a white lie for us both, “maybe your parents will have had a change of heart.”
Jonny stared at me for a little while, and I stared back, then he inched closer. “Chris, I just want you to know that, despite what happened, these last few weeks were the best weeks of my life. Because I got to spend them with you.”
He laid his hand on top of mine, and in return I kissed him.
“I'm gonna miss this,” I muttered.
“Yeah, me too.”
For the rest of the day we just sat with each other and talked sometimes. But really, we never had to say anything. He placed his arms around me, I rested my head on his chest, and I could feel that warm sensation rush through me again. Our hearts beat as one, our pain and happiness and suffering and joy all mixed together and spread evenly throughout us both.
Around six o'clock Jonny's parents arrived to take him back. They stood in the living room while they waited, and when Jonny finally walked into the room his mother ran towards him and hugged him with as much effort as she could muster.
“Jonny, I can't believe it. I thought I'd never see you again!” Jonny hugged her back, but he wasn't nearly as glad as she was. “How could you put us through something like that?”
“It was pretty easy,” he said, coldly. “You didn't seem to care how I felt, so I just ignored every thought I had about how devastated you'd be.”
His mother looked up at me, and while her gaze I found entirely frightening, I stared back with what I thought was at least a tiny bit of courage.
“Your father and I have decided on something,” she said, eyes still pointed squarely in my direction. “And we won't send you away, but you have to promise us one thing.”
“What?”
She pulled back and looked motherly into Jonny's eyes. “You have to promise not to ever keep another secret from us again. At least as long as you're living under our roof. Understand? I don't care what it is you're doing, there will be absolutely no lying and no sneaking around.”
“Uh...” Jonny leaned forward a little and quietly said to her, “I have something I need to tell you when we get home.”
“Why can't you tell me now?” she asked in the same low voice.
“Because I'm nervous and-or afraid and I need time to prepare,” he quickly said. But when his mother said nothing in return he sighed and looked back at me. “I guess maybe you would want to know, too.”
My heart beat a tad faster as I tried to think of what he was talking about. I had been under the impression that he never hid anything from me, though I guess that was wrong.
“Know what?” I asked.
Jonny walked over to me and said, “You know you're very special to me, right?” I nodded and Jonny turned to the rest of the room, namely his mother and father. “If you have a problem with Chris and I being together because he's a boy, then you're not going to like anyone else I would be with.”
I felt Jonny's hand grip my own tightly and I was suddenly very scared for him. But I was also proud.
“Are you telling us that you're gay?” his mother bluntly asked.
“Yeah. I mean, I guess it's not such a big surprise, but... yeah.”
There was a silence, awkward and a little painful, as it seemed nearly impossible to tell how Jonny's parents were reacting to this. Then someone finally cleared their throat and spoke.
“Chris, are you...?” my sister asked. I was a bit grateful that she only sounded curious and not disgusted.
I shrugged. “I don't know. And I honestly don't care.”
Jonny's mother walked over and placed her hand on his back. “Come on, I think it's time for us to leave now. We'll discuss this further when we've returned home.”
Jonny smiled at me as he let go of my hand. “Bye, Chris. I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
It seemed like his parents tried to pretend they didn't hear us say that, but I didn't mind. Jonny gave me a cute little wave goodbye then headed out the door, followed closely by his parents. His mother stopped before shutting the door and waved at me, too, though not as friendly as she could have.
And even though I didn't know it for sure, I felt like everything was going to be OK. For the first time in months, everything was going to be OK.
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