In the Middle of Summer

-Prologue-

Jonny looked over the faces of the people sitting before him. There had to be at least a hundred people, all there to witness this great day. The happiest day of his life.

He was nervous, definitely; it was already a really hot day, and on top of that he was wearing a full tuxedo and his palms refused to be dry, regardless of how often he wiped them on his pants.

The girls across from him were standing patiently, the flowers they held not withstanding the heat much better than Jonny was. They were both engaged in conversation, quietly whispering to each other about God knows what.

Jonny scanned the crowd again. He wasn't looking for anyone- everyone he wanted to be there was there, he knew- he was just looking for something to do. Time was going by so slowly.

After he was done staring, he turned to the man beside him. He gave Jonny a reassuring smile and pat on the back. It didn't help Jonny's nerves at all.

Then the music began to play.

-Chapter One-

“Excuse me... Jonny, right?”

Jonny turned around to see the man with the curly cinnamon-brown hair who had been sitting in the first pew on the left side. The man's eyes were extraordinarily blue, but the first thing Jonny noticed was that he had an abnormally large nose.

“Yeah,” Jonny answered, unenthusiastically.

“I'm Chris.” The man held out his hand, which Jonny tentatively shook. He really just wanted to go home. That's what everyone else was doing; all around people were standing from their seats and leaving through the one exit way, all thoroughly disappointed.

As they both took their hands back, a woman passed in between them. She glared nastily at Chris as she walked by, and he merely looked back as though he couldn't understand why she seemed to hate him. Jonny thought nothing of it.

“So, you're one of her family, then?”

“I'm her brother,” Chris said. Another man walking by sneered at him. “And I honestly can't say I'm surprised, but... I'm sorry.”

“Did you know she wouldn't show up?” Jonny narrowed his eyes at Chris. He felt like being angry at someone, and Chris seemed to present himself to be such a person. A lot of the others leaving from around them thought so, too.

“No, I thought she'd actually changed.” Chris looked to the floor and smiled with a bit of sarcasm. “I guess that's like people thought I would change, too.”

“What do you mean?”

Chris raised his eyes to Jonny. He waited a few moments, then let out a heavy sigh. “You know I wasn't actually invited? But I came anyway, hoping that she'd appreciate my presence. It was supposed to be a big day, as I'm sure you know.”

Jonny didn't know what the hell Chris was talking about, and he was beginning to see why these people didn't like him. Of course, he was mistaken.

“Yeah, I do know,” Jonny bitterly replied, biting his tongue to refrain from further retorts.

“Sorry.”

As the last few people shot their looks of hatred at Chris, Jonny's feelings did an odd one-eighty and he suddenly felt sympathetic. He shouldn't be angry at Chris, for none of this was his fault. He was just a harmless being that Jonny wanted so badly to take his frustration out on.

Naturally, the only thing to do was ask Chris if he wanted to get a drink.

“Well, I think you could use a drink more than I could,” he said. “But I'll go with you. I'll be your designated driver, how about that?”

That sounded wonderful to Jonny, so the two men left along with everyone else. Having been brought to the church by a limousine that was still waiting outside, Jonny decided it would be appropriate for the two to drive around in it.

“See,” Jonny said as they slid into the back of the limo, “now you can have a drink with me.”

“I'm fine, thanks. I'm actually not that big on alcohol.” Jonny scoffed, and Chris laughed incredulously. “What? I'm not!”

“Everyone's big on alcohol. Or maybe you're just too big on it, is that what?” Jonny grabbed the bottle of wine that was resting beside him. He didn't want to say it and risk coming off too rash and abrasive, but he thought that perhaps this was the lack of change that Chris had been referring to before. He could have been a recovering alcoholic, and a failed one at that, though if he was adamantly refusing a drink then perhaps he was doing rather well with it.

“I'm not too big on it,” Chris replied, a bit of his laughter still lingering around. “If it'll make you feel better, I'll have one glass. One glass, that's it.”

“That's what I'm talking about,” Jonny cheerfully hooted, quickly pouring Chris a glass of the red liquid. Chris chuckled at Jonny's enthusiasm. When they'd both had their glasses filled, Jonny proposed a toast to the awfulness of women, and Chris clinked his glass against Jonny's with more conviction than Jonny realized.

“I'd hate to trash talk your sister, but-” Jonny tipsily began.

“No, no, by all means, go ahead,” Chris said with clarity. He knew how to hold his liquor. He also knew how not to drink it. “It's not like she's ever done much for me, anyway. Honestly, I think she's a bitch.”

“She is a bitch,” Jonny agreed in a strangely calm voice. He tilted his head, trying to look at Chris from a different angle both literally and metaphorically. “Why did you come to the wedding, then, if you hate her?”

“Well, I don't want to hate her. She's my sister. I was hoping we could get past whatever stupid shit is holding us back.” Chris swirled the wine around in his glass. “But anyway, trash talk her.”

“Oh.” Jonny looked down at his own glass and frowned. “I think 'bitch' pretty much covers it.”

Chris stared at Jonny admiringly and smiled a little. “You really are something else, aren't you?” Jonny's eyes, unfocused, met Chris's, and his head lolled around a little. “I can see why she'd want to marry you. But I can't see why she'd leave you.”

“Maybe I'm a bitch, too,” Jonny suggested. “Or.. a... I don't know. Something else like that.”

“You seem like a very nice man,” Chris told him. “A little drunk,” he added with a laugh, “but nice.”

Jonny hiccuped and tried to focus. He observed Chris, letting his eyes roll over Chris's many interesting facial features. “You have a really big nose.”

Jonny was under the impression that his last statement was merely a thought; he didn't realize that he'd actually vocalized it until Chris reacted. Thankfully, Chris took his ascertainment rather well, merely grinning even wider.

“Thanks,” he facetiously replied. “You know, Jonny, I think we could be great friends.”

-Chapter Two-

Chris checked his phone for the third time in five minutes. It was working perfectly fine, and he knew it was, but he still kept looking at it to make sure he hadn't missed the call.

It had been three days since the wedding, three days since he'd climbed out of the back of the limousine and handed Jonny a slip of paper with his number. Jonny was supposed to call him and together they'd arrange a time to hang out. But he hadn't heard from Jonny at all.

There were several reasons Chris could think of for this: Jonny forgot about calling, maybe because he was drunk when Chris bid him farewell and suggested they meet up again; Jonny lost the number, which seemed plausible at least; or Jonny just didn't want to see him. But the last one seemed ridiculous, because Chris was under the impression that they both had a good time chatting in the back of the limo.

He checked his phone a fourth time, lying to himself by claiming that it was only to look at the time. It was three o'clock. Chris recognized how pathetic he was.

As soon as he closed his phone, though, it rang. Not bothering to look at the number, he quickly answered it and chirped, “Hello!” into the speaker.

“Hi, uh, it's Jonny. Sorry I didn't call you earlier. I've been a bit...distracted.”

“It's OK!” Chris replied, beaming. For the next few minutes they talked about how their lives had played out over the previous days, then Jonny proposed they meet up in the center of town.

“There's that Italian place at the corner of Main and Park. I can make it there in about fifteen minutes,” Jonny said.

“All right, I'll see you then.” Chris threw his phone onto his bed, nearly forgetting to end the call, and immediately ran to his closet. He pulled the door back and shoved all of the hanging shirts to the left side. One by one he went through the shirts, and one by one he deemed them unworthy.

With only three shirts left to leaf through, Chris glanced behind him and peered at the clock by his bedside. It had been five minutes since Jonny called. Time was wasting away.

Chris finally decided upon the penultimate shirt, a royal purple v-neck that fit snugly, but was not too tight. Chris smoothed down the wrinkles in the fabric around his chest as stared into his full body mirror. His jeans were a bit tattered and old, but he actually thought they looked a bit stylish, so he kept them on. He only owned one pair of shoes, so that didn't matter, but with only five minutes left he frantically tried to fix his hair. The curls were growing a little too long, but fortunately that meant he was able to tuck them behind his ears, which he'd once been told looked cute.

He ran out the door and down the stairs onto the street. The restaurant Jonny had mentioned was right across the street from Chris's apartment, and the road was clear of nearly all cars. Chris kept on running across the pavement, stopping once he reached the other side. It was another three minutes before he could see Jonny making his way down the sidewalk in the distance.

“Are you hungry? I'm not really hungry,” Jonny said after they greeted each other, his eyes shot sideways at the building next to them. “I guess I haven't eaten much the past few days.”

“I'm fine. I ate a few hours ago.”

“It was just the first place I thought of to meet,” Jonny explained, gesturing to the restaurant, and Chris nodded his head in understanding.

“We can go somewhere else,” Chris replied.

Jonny stared at the ground, thinking; there wasn't much around to do in this town, really, apart from walking. Jonny didn't really feel like just walking.

“Maybe we could see a movie or something,” Jonny suggested. “Is there anything funny playing? I could use a good laugh.”

“Well, I guess we'll find out.” Chris smiled and together they headed in the direction of a nearby theater. It just so happened that there was a 3:30 show of some comedy that had been released only a week before, and Chris happily offered to buy Jonny's ticket as well as his own.

“If you really feel that bad, you can pay me back later. But don't worry about it now,” Chris told him, Jonny's hand frozen around the wallet in his pocket.

“Fine,” he sighed. The guilty look on his face faded, though the feeling was still there inside him. He followed Chris into the viewing room, holding the door open behind him for the other people walking in.

“Where should we sit?” Chris asked. He figured it would be best to let Jonny decide, because it didn't matter much to him.

“Here's fine,” Jonny said, pointing behind Chris. Chris spun around and saw with great surprise that Jonny was pointing to the last row in the theater. Begrudgingly, Chris took a seat in the middle of the row, his mind blanking a little as he came in contact with the rough fabric of the chair.

Jonny sat beside him, as was expected. The previews wouldn't be on for another five minutes or so, and thus there was plenty of time left for Jonny to start talking to Chris about how much he hated waiting for movies to start.

“I don't see why they can't play this shit in the lobby and just keep the place quiet until the movie comes on,” Jonny complained. “I don't really care what actor had to learn German for his role in a World War II movie.”

“It does get annoying after a while,” Chris said. Luckily for them, it was only a few seconds later that the lights dimmed and the previews began.

Chris heard Jonny mutter, “Finally,” under his breath, then Jonny leaned over a little and set his arm down on the armrest between his and Chris's seats. Chris stole a glance and swallowed with a bit of difficulty.

Chris kept his hands clasped in his lap. Years of experience had taught him not to count his cards; Jonny had been, after all, set to marry his sister. Chris looked forward and watched as some title appeared on the large screen, a man's voice booming throughout the room.

-Chapter Three-

Everyday for the next week Chris and Jonny spent time together. They would go out to eat, or walk around town, and slowly their friendship grew stronger. Of course, there was still a lot they didn't know about each other.

The fork was angled more toward the spoon than the knife. Chris moved it so it was parallel to both. At least there was one thing he could control.

Chris had become very enamored of Jonny, but he tried his best to hide it. It wasn't that difficult a task, though, as Jonny seemed rather oblivious in that area.

Chris stared at the ketchup bottle, the salt and pepper shakers, the tiny sugar packets. He impatiently tapped his foot on the floor.

Against his better judgment, Chris had invited Jonny to dinner with the intention of letting him know how he felt. But he figured everyone's only given one shot to live, so why not at least try? Maybe because he was trying for the man who nearly married his sister.

He arrived long before Jonny did, though purposely. He needed as much time to prepare as he could get. Hoping that Jonny would show up soon, because he was starting to drive himself crazy, Chris went over the speech he'd practiced one last time.

His hand shook and he took a deep breath.

“So... I have something to tell you,” he quietly said to the imaginary Jonny in front of him. “And maybe I should have told you before. It's just... Well, see, the reason why my sister and I- well, all of my family, really, the reason why they all hate me is...”

Chris looked down at his hands. He tried to remember the exact words he had come up with before, but they seemed to slip past him. He took another deep breath, looked up at the empty space across the table, and started over.

“Jonny, I should have told you this before, but... the reason I wasn't invited to the wedding, and why my family hates me, as I'm sure you noticed, and actually, the reason why I asked you here tonight is because,” he quickly took in as much air as possible, “I'm gay. And, well, I like you. I'm sure you don't like me, though, but that's OK. I mean, it would be nice if you did, but I'm not expecting you to. I just thought I'd let you know...”

Chris let his voice trail off before he dropped his head into his hands and groaned in frustration. If he couldn't even get it right when he was talking to himself, how was he going to come across as anything other than a complete idiot while talking to Jonny?

“Chris?”

His head shot up at the familiarity of the voice, his pulse racing and his stomach churning. Sure enough, Jonny stood before him, tall and smiling, and Chris stood up to greet him.

“Hey, man,” Chris said. He and Jonny shared a brief hug, during which time Chris noticed the presence of a third person.

“Uh, I hope you don't mind, but I brought someone with me, someone I'd like for you to meet,” Jonny said. He reached his arm back and pulled close a petite woman, brown-haired and wide-eyed. Even Chris thought she looked pretty. “This is Carla, my new girlfriend.”

Chris locked up; his brain felt like it was going to explode, his heart like it was being stabbed over and over again.

“It's nice to meet you,” he absentmindedly replied, then quickly sit down for fear that his legs would no longer support him.

Jonny, only marginally noticing that something was wrong, said to Carla, “Carla, this is Chris,” and then the two sat down in the opposite side of the booth.

“Jonny's told me a bit about you,” Carla said. Although she had a nice face, her voice, which Chris felt was a little whiny, a little high-pitched, was not so nice. “I'm guessing he hasn't said anything about me before, though?”

“No, he hasn't,” Chris replied, his mind still struggling to focus. If he had been paying attention, he would have seen Carla's mouth twitch with disappointment.

Carla gave Chris a brief run-through of her life, none of which he heard. He tried to inconspicuously stare at Jonny for as long as he could. He had expected Jonny to reject him, but he would never have guessed that anything like this would happen. Maybe one day it would have, but now it just seemed like the worst timing ever.

The timing seemed to be a concern to Jonny as well, because when Carla excused herself under the pretense of needing to use the ladies' room, he leaned forward and quietly spoke to Chris, “I know it seems quick, only a week and a half after the wedding. It's a rebound, I know. We probably won't be together for more than a month.” Chris tried not to cringe as he thought of just how long that month would be. “But... you know, I need to get over this. I need to get over Jen.”

“I'm sure it's not easy,” Chris feebly replied.

“I think she understands, too,” Jonny added, staring in the direction of the restrooms, as if Carla's knowledge of the situation absolved him of any personal responsibility. “I mean, I've known her for a while. She knew about the wedding...”

Chris repressed the surge of sadness that threatened to consume him. He tried not to think of how handsome Jonny looked at the moment, and how Jonny probably dolled himself up just for Carla, even though he needn't have done so. Jonny looked back at Chris.

“She was there for me. She is there for me. That's what I need,” Jonny said, and he gave a small shrug as if to say that's that. But Chris was more intuitive than Jonny gave him credit for, and he realized that if Jonny had actually believed everything he was saying, there would be no need for him to say it, no need to explain his new relationship to Chris.

-Chapter Four-

“I never knew Jen had a brother.” Chris kept his eyes down most of the time to avoid seeing Jonny's arm wrapped around Carla's shoulder. For this particular response it seemed to add to the drama.

“As far as she's concerned, she doesn't,” he told Carla.

“Why is that?” Jonny sincerely asked, and Chris accidentally looked up. He played it cool, though; he sighed and went back to staring at the table.

“I'd rather not get into right now.” It worked, and Chris was relieved. He wouldn't have minded saying if the circumstances had been different.

Carla turned her head so that her mouth was mere inches from Jonny's neck, softly saying, “Jonny, I think I'm getting a bit tired.”

Chris scoffed to himself; it was only eight o'clock, eight-thirty at the latest. But he couldn't say that he wouldn't be glad to go home and sulk on his own. Maybe he would curl up on his couch and have a Spongebob marathon that stretched into the wee morning hours. He would never admit it to anyone, but whenever he was feeling down he would turn to Spongebob, and that would generally do the trick.

“Right. Why don't you go wait in the car and I'll be out in a few minutes,” Jonny said. He haphazardly kissed her cheek, and she slid out of the seat and began to walk away. Chris felt it finally safe to look up for an extended period of time.

“I'm glad you're happy,” he said. Jonny looked bewildered for some reason, like it was completely out of character for Chris to say such a thing. He shook his head and smiled at Chris.

“Thanks, man.” Jonny picked up the check, stared at it for a while, then went for his wallet. He refused to let Chris pay for his half, claiming that this would be how Jonny would repay him for the movie. Chris had nearly forgotten about that, and it really wouldn't have mattered to him if Jonny had ever paid him back. But Jonny was being very stubborn about this, so Chris agreed to let him pay for the meal.

“I'll call you tomorrow, yeah?” Jonny said as they parted ways, Jonny to head for his car and Chris to walk off alone into the cool summer night. Chris smiled at him, hands in his pockets and heart in pieces, and he nodded in agreement. Then he watched as Jonny walked away, and continued to watch until the man's figure disappeared into the darkness.

It seemed that Spongebob helped him forget his pain for a little while, but it ultimately didn't help; by the time the sun rose the next morning he had remembered, and the sadness rushed over him as though he had just met Carla seconds before.

He didn't know why he was having such a hard time dealing with it. It wasn't even the first time he'd been in this sort of situation. With the other cases he'd managed to get over it relatively quickly, sometimes even within a few minutes. But maybe he never liked someone as much as he liked Jonny.

The thought scared Chris a little. Jonny was definitely a great man, definitely someone Chris really wanted in his life, but there was such a small chance of them ending up together. As he lie on the sofa in his living room he closed his eyes, sighing and hoping that he wasn't just maybe falling for Jonny.

He decided to leave the apartment and go for a walk even before Jonny called him. He brought his cell with him just in case, though. As he made his way down Main Street, nearing the halfway mark (a rather old and beaten looking streetlight), his phone vibrated.

I see you. the text message read. It creeped him out just a little, even after he saw that it was from Jonny. He sighed as he shoved his phone back into his pocket, and he went to turn around, but was stopped by the sudden presence of hands on his shoulders.

“Did I scare you?” Jonny said in a low voice, directing his words right into Chris's ear. Chris held his breath for a minute until his sudden nausea passed.

“No,” he plainly said, and two seconds later Jonny had let go of him and was laughing rather jollily. Chris weakly joined in, and Jonny noticed that his heart wasn't in it.

“Why so down today, Mister Christopher?” Jonny asked, the concern in his tone and invention of a new nickname threatening to suffocate Chris.

“Well, Jonny,” Chris began, pointlessly fixing the collar of his shirt, “I would guess that maybe it's just one of those days. You know?”

“Ah, yeah, I hate that.” Jonny nodded shortly, smirked a little, then gently tapped Chris's arm. “Hey, why don't we go do something, then, to cheer you up?”

Chris's first thought was to respond with, “Yeah, I know just what we could do,” but luckily his second thought of Don't be an idiot came quickly enough to save him from himself.

“What do you have in mind?” He figured giving Jonny the option of what to do was much better than racking his brain for an activity that wouldn't lose him his new friendship with Jonny.

Jonny looked up to the sky, and Chris took in the way the light hit Jonny's beautifully green eyes and made them shine. A moment later he looked back at Chris and beamed. “You know that hardware store that shut down a few months ago?”

“Uh.. yeah.”

“Well,” Jonny's smile grew impossibly larger, “some bloke came along and renovated it. Now it's an arcade.” Jonny tilted his head and raised his eyebrows. Chris involuntarily grinned.

“I'm not-”

“You're not big on arcades?” Jonny interrupted with the same skepticism he'd had in the limousine. “Well, I'm not big on people who are... sad. So, you're just gonna have to deal with it.”

Before Chris could protest again, he was being dragged down the street, his arm tightly gripped by Jonny's hand. Half of him wanted to pull away and tell Jonny to just leave him along, but luckily he didn't listen to that half; instead, he just went along with it, laughing and letting himself feel maybe a little too comfortable.

-Chapter Five-

Jonny looked at Chris. Chris didn't notice, his eyes stuck on the screen in front of them. The light danced across his face, reflected in his tired eyes.

“Jonny, you're dying,” he solemnly said.

“Chris, you're depressing,” Jonny replied without skipping a beat. “Listen, I'm the one who's supposed to be upset. And-”

“That pink ghost's gonna get you-”

“-even if I'm maybe not so upset, I still don't want you to be unhappy.” Jonny frowned at Chris. Chris lifted his sad eyes to Jonny.

“Now you're dead.”

Jonny sighed and looked around the room. Chris stared at him, trying to figure out why he felt this way. He actually really did like arcades, and since Jonny had brought him there he had begun to feel better. But somehow that had changed.

“Dance with me,” Jonny abruptly said, and Chris blinked at him a few times in utter confusion. Jonny, seeing this, pointed past Chris's head and repeated his command.

Chris turned; behind him a few feet away was a DDR machine. He wanted to say no, but the energetic five-year-old inside of him couldn't resist. To not seem too enthused, though, he calmly walked over to the machine.

“Come on, Buckland,” he said, stepping onto the hard mat, “you're going down.”

Jonny laughed, inserted two coins into the proper slot, and joined Chris on the opposite mat. “I do believe that's you, Mister Christopher.”

Again with the nickname. Chris felt a rush of something swoop over him, but he had a feeling it would only do him harm in the long run. Still, he stupidly allowed himself to forget and just live in the present moment.

Five minutes later Chris had been proven wrong; Jonny was much better at the game than he'd expected. He's managed to score an entire thousand points higher than Chris. He started to do a victory dance, until he realized that maybe bragging like that wouldn't help Chris feel better.

“Sorry, I guess that's not helping,” he quickly said and stopped dancing. But Chris was laughing harder than he had been all day.

“No,” Chris said, “don't be sorry, I thoroughly enjoy seeing you make a fool of yourself.”

Jonny narrowed his eyes, then laughed along, the sound of his deep voice and the image of his bright smile invading Chris's soul without remorse. The sound of footsteps approaching was muffled by their laughter.

“I wouldn't be so cocky if I were you,” a manly voice said. “I've been watching, and you're nothin' compared to me.”

Jonny and Chris simultaneously looked back to find a short man behind them. The way he dressed made him seem as though he put on a tough facade in order to counteract his height. For a minute or so Jonny was even under the impression that he was being insulted by some teenage punk.

“Really,” Jonny disinterestedly replied. “Is that so?”

The short man took a large step forward, trying to appear intimidating by leaning very close to Jonny. “Yeah, that is so.” Chris couldn't help momentarily feeling a little jealous. “I'll bet I can kick your ass all around this dance mat.”

Jonny looked into the man's eyes, rather intrigued. “All right, you've got yourself a deal.”

Chris backed off his own mat and cautiously walked over to Jonny's side. The short man was soon joined by a group of his own friends, three other men who basically looked the same as he did, more or less.

“Oh, look, Matt's got himself into another dance-off,” one of them said.

Another replied, “Again? What a dork.”

“Shut up, guys!!” Matt snapped, and the three men laughed at him. Matt popped the collar of his shirt to rebuild his rough appearance, though it really didn't do anything but make him look increasingly phony. “Are you ready to do this or what?” he asked Jonny.

“Yeah, I'm ready whenever you are,” Jonny said.

Chris put his hand on Jonny's back and assured him he'd do well, though he quickly removed it and regretted the action just a little. It seemed like he was having a harder time now hiding his emotions than he had before, which was strange to him.

The music started and Jonny and Matt prepared themselves, Matt hopping up and down in place a few times and Jonny making sure his stance was all right. The arrows floated up the screen and both men hit them perfectly, until forty seconds in when Jonny missed one, bringing forth an eruption of “ohhhh!”s from his opponent.

“It's OK, Jonny, keep going. You're doing great!” Chris told him.

In truth, Chris would not have noticed Jonny's mistake had it not been for the outburst from the other side; Chris's eyes weren't on the screen, too busy darting back and forth between Jonny and the floor in shame.

The difficulty of the track escalated exponentially in the last thirty seconds, and the last ten forced the men to let their feet stay on the mats for no longer than a miniscule fraction of a second. Matt somehow fumbled and ended up being a little off, so he nearly missed the very last few arrows.

The men stopped, panting, and waited for their ultimate scores. Much to Matt and his friends' dismay, the totals appeared in Jonny's favor.

“OH!” Jonny shouted, as Matt thought of a way to redeem himself. “Oh!”

Jonny spun around and jumped off the mat, landing next to Chris and practically tackling Chris into a triumphant hug. Chris was smiling at Jonny's success, but the smile soon faded as he realized Jonny's sweaty body pressed against his was not a good idea.

And it may have only been Chris's fretfulness that made it seem so, but Jonny didn't appear to break the embrace for a very long time. Every tiny moment that went by was like blissful agony for Chris, and he tried, but failed, to distract himself by watching the losers sneer at them.

Then Jonny decided the situation also called for a double-handed high-five, because he and Chris had clearly not touched each other enough already.

-Chapter Six-

Since it was usually Jonny who called first each day, and the sun had nearly set entirely without Chris receiving so much as a text, he was a little worried.

“Jonny, I'm just calling to check up on you because I haven't heard from you yet today,” Chris said. The fact that he had to leave a voicemail didn't assuage his worry at all. “And, you know, I just want to make sure you're OK-”

Suddenly there was a click, and Jonny's voice came through dull and monotonous, “Hey, Chris. Sorry... I haven't called all day. I kinda... forgot.”

Chris felt a stab of sorrow in his chest, due not to the idea of Jonny forgetting him, but the obvious distress Jonny was in. “What's wrong?” Chris pressed his shoulder against his ear to keep it in place as he put on a light jacket. Then he grabbed his keys.

“Oh, you know... I got dumped. Nothing... important.” Jonny sighed and the air crackled through Chris's speaker.

“Shit, man,” Chris sympathetically replied, turning the key in his door and making sure the lock clicked properly. Despite his desire over the last three weeks or so to hear Jonny say that he no longer had a girlfriend, Chris seemed to focus more on Jonny's well-being than his own personal feelings. “You want some company?”

“You don't have to. I'm... fine on my own.”

“Well, you don't sound fine. And actually, I'm coming over whether or not you like it.” Chris pushed open the door and entered the outside world. The sky was almost completely black, a few stars peeking out here and there.

“Thanks,” Jonny replied, and even through the phone Chris could tell he was smiling a bit. At least, he thought it sounded in Jonny's voice like he was smiling.

Chris was at Jonny's door in about five minutes, and as he waited for Jonny to answer he unconsciously tucked his curls behind his ears and even dusted his jacket off a bit. Jonny looked awful, his mouth turned down in a frown that made his cheeks look sunken and his eyes baggy.

“Do you want to go for a walk?” Chris asked him almost immediately. “It's a beautiful night, and it looks like you could do with some fresh air.”

Jonny stared at Chris for a while, and just when Chris began to feel uncomfortable he said, “All right.”

Jonny shut the door behind him and began to walk ahead of Chris. Chris caught up to him when they were out on the barely lit sidewalk, and to entertain himself he did a weird trick with his feet so that they were walking in step.

“Chris, you don't have a girlfriend, do you?” Jonny asked, rather randomly, and Chris was a little afraid of where this conversation would end up. But he kept his confidence regardless.

“No,” he answered. “And I never have.”

Jonny did a double-take, though that was in no way enough to convince him that he had heard correctly. “Wait, seriously, you've never had a girlfriend?”

Chris shrugged and looked off into the dark distance. “It's not something I'm interested in.” Jonny was silent for a while, thinking.

“Oh, so you've had boyfriends then?” he asked. Chris was a little surprised by not only Jonny's quickness to understand, but his seeming indifference to the subject.

“Yes,” Chris replied honestly. “I have been with other people before, just not girls.”

“How come you never said anything before?”

Chris thought briefly about telling Jonny the truth, but he decided against it. Maybe there would be a time for that in the future, but for now he just wanted to enjoy his time with Jonny. “I guess I just didn't think it was relevant.”

The men walked for tens of minutes without even realizing that much time had passed. As they strolled through the streets, Jonny further interrogated Chris. He mostly asked questions pertaining to Chris's sexuality and past relationships, but he wasn't judgmental; his questions seemed to suggest that he simply wanted to know more about Chris.

“Did you ever go to, like, a gay bar or something?” Jonny asked.

“Ah, no. I don't believe in going to bars to pick people up. I mean, you're probably just gonna end up meeting an alcoholic.”

Chris laughed a little, but Jonny kept a straight face. “So, you just go to weddings instead and hope the bride doesn't show?”

“What?” Chris asked not incredulously, but stunned. They both stopped walking, and Jonny stared at the ground, his eyes bulging and wondering what the hell had made him say that. Then Chris hesitantly stepped a little closer to Jonny. “I do like you.”

Jonny looked up, the confusion in his face washing away and revealing a new, unidentifiable emotion. “I want to like you,” he said in a low voice.

“You want to like me?”

“Yes. You're really nice and funny- you're a great guy.” Jonny smiled, but his mouth twitched after a few seconds and the grin was bittersweet. “But you're a guy.”

“Oh, well, that's, uh...” Chris flustered; he could feel his cheeks burning hot. “That's really...”

“There were actually a few times over the past couple of weeks when I wished Carla could be you. She... I don't know, I guess I thought she was a different person. She's not awful, mind, just not what I expected, I guess.”

Silence fell, and the two men were lost in their thoughts, the town around them beginning to sleep. Chris stared absentmindedly at a street sign nearby, and Jonny was watching a car that sat parked on the side of the road, but he quickly moved his eyes to something else. Chris felt odd for a second, and he realized why once he looked over and saw Jonny staring intently at him.

Then the next thing he knew their lips were locked together and sparks were shooting from everywhere in his body into the air. When it was over he hardly believed it was real, until he opened his eyes and saw that Jonny was still only about an inch away from him.

“Nothing?” Chris expectantly asked, patiently awaiting his disappointment.

“Um... more than you would think, actually.” The words hit Chris like some blunt force and made him lightheaded, though he really had trouble keeping his consciousness when Jonny's hands slid in the space between Chris's jacket and t-shirt. If Chris had fallen forward, Jonny would have been sure to catch him with his lips, which was basically what happened anyway.

As his tongue met Jonny's, Chris laid his hand on the side of Jonny's face, letting it rest near his ear and his fingertips brushed against Jonny's hair. His other hand rested on Jonny's hip, and if he had been aware of anything other than the kiss he would have thought how strange it was for him to finally be doing this.

-Chapter Seven-

“I can't believe you slept out here.” Chris looked up and blinked away his sleepiness. He smiled at the sight of Jonny leaning over the couch and staring at him.

“Me neither.” He sat up and brought his knees to his chest, though he still took up half the sofa. Jonny walked around and sat down on the now-empty portion.

“I mean, I would have gladly let you take my bed, and I'd have slept on this awful sofa,” Jonny said. Chris wrapped his arms around his legs.

“Water under the bridge now, isn't it? I didn't mind.” Chris leaned a bit and rested his chin on his knees. He watched Jonny, who was staring down at his feet and stretching his toes. “Good morning, by the way.”

Jonny slowly looked up and smiled kindly. “Good morning.”

“Did you even get any sleep?” Chris sweetly asked, though he was certain he knew the answer.

Jonny shook his head a little. “Nope,” he answered. “But... because I couldn't stop thinking about Jen. God, you look so much like her.”

“Well, we are twins,” Chris quietly said, and Jonny's eyes widened in response.

“What?” he nearly shrieked in his deep voice. “How is it that you've managed to hide all of this information from me until just now?”

“I don't know,” Chris said with a laugh. Then he dropped his legs down to the floor and scooted over next to Jonny. Their hands nearly touched. Chris just stared as Jonny kept his head down.

“Chris... I'm not sure that we should... I mean, it's not that I regret kissing you, I... I don't know if this...” Jonny taped his thumb against the upholstery of the sofa, searching for the right words. He sighed when he couldn't think of anything after a while.

“I understand,” Chris genuinely replied. “Like you said last night, I'm a guy. I get it.”

“You're not mad at me?”

“Of course not. Listen, I actually don't mind only being friends with you, especially since I know that you would like me... and, if I'm perfectly honest, it's a hell of a lot easier to accept us only being friends when you're single.” Jonny laughed and brought his green eyes in line with Chris's blue ones.

“All right,” he said. “But I do have to admit something. Usually when I'm unsure of whether or not I want to be in a relationship, it ends up being one of the more serious ones I've had. Like with your sister...”

Chris smiled at him and tried not to get his hopes up regardless of what he had just heard. “What do you want to do today, Jonny?”

“Nothing, really,” Jonny replied. “It's raining anyway, isn't it?”

Chris raised an eyebrow and looked up at the ceiling, as if that would help him clarify. He did indeed begin to hear the light patter of rain, though it was probably the rain hitting the window that he heard.

“So it is... Could we just hang out here, then?” Chris asked.

“Sure.” Jonny sat even further back than he was before, almost trying to sink into the sofa. He laced his fingers together and placed them on his abdomen, and Chris sadly moved his own hand from where it had been. “Here's an idea, why don't you tell me more about yourself? Because I get the feeling there's a lot I don't know.”

“Fair enough. Where should I start?”

For what seemed like hours, Chris went on and on about his childhood. He told Jonny about his elementary school experiences being teased by the bigger kids in his class for being as scrawny as he was, about his junior high school experiences being teased by the jocks in his class for being in the mixed choir, about his high school experiences being alienated from his family after coming out, and about his adult experiences learning that his family had excluded him from almost everything.

“I only heard about Jen's wedding- Jen's and yours- because I had to make the horrible trip to my parents' house to pick something up from my mum,” Chris explained. “I found the invitation posted on the fridge. So I wrote down the information and stuff when she wasn't looking and stuffed the paper into my pocket. Then I crashed the wedding, and no one seemed too happy about that.”

“I'm happy you did,” Jonny said, and Chris smiled a little.

“Right, the people on your side didn't care that I was there. But everyone else, I think, was trying to pretend I wasn't.” Chris stared at the wall across the room, and as he talked he didn't notice that Jonny was slowly sliding down in his seat. “I also discovered when I went to see my mum that my dad had died, and apparently I was not important enough to be informed. Or asked to attend the funeral.”

Jonny let his head fall to the side, and it stopped moving once it hit Chris's shoulder. Chris looked down at him and couldn't help grinning. He decided then to be silent until Jonny spoke, because he didn't want to ruin what was such a nice moment for him.

“I... I'm still not entirely sure...”

“It's OK, remember? I understand,” Chris said, though he felt as though there was nothing for him to understand. Things seemed to be going his way now.

“Yeah, but you saying that just makes me want you more.” Jonny shifted a little so that he was able to wrap both arms around Chris's stomach. Chris intended to move his arm and let his hand rest on Jonny's lower back, but he was stopped by the fit of giggles that burst from inside of him.

“I'm sorry,” he said through laughter when Jonny looked up at him with concern, “but that tickles.”

“It does, does it?” Jonny asked, sitting up, and Chris bit his lip and nodded. “Well, then, I wonder what it would be like if I do this-”

Jonny proceeded to actually tickle Chris, and Chris screeched howls of laughter into the air as he uncontrollably twitched and realized that at this point his life was wonderful.

-Chapter Eight-

“Chris,” Jonny slowly began, “I think you're my best friend.”

Chris set down the glass of water he was holding and said nothing, just blinking at Jonny contemplatively.

“Did you know I think you look very nice tonight, Jonny,” Chris mentioned.

“Yes, you told me that earlier.” Jonny shifted his eyes about the table for a while. His heart was starting to pound in his chest. “Did you hear-”

“Yes,” Chris replied with a smile, “and you're treating it like it's a love confession. I like it.”

Jonny flustered a little, spots of red bleeding through his cheeks; he hadn't meant for it to sound that way, but he knew that Chris was right. And Jonny sort of liked it, too.

Chris leaned across the table, laying one his hands over his chest. “You're my best friend, too,” he whispered very secretively. Then he laughed, sat back, and drank some more water. “Of course, it's not like I really have other friends.”

“Neither do I. I thought I did, but it seems that maybe they were all just Jen's friends.”

“That very same thing happened to me,” Chris said with a blank expression. “When I was a teenager, of course. I guess that's not so surprising, though, considering we're twins. But they were all her friends first, kinda like...”

Chris's voice faded into the air and he stared into the empty space before him. Jonny waited for a bit, then bent forward and said, “Kinda like...”

Chris looked at Jonny and shook his head a little. “Kinda like how you were her boyfriend first,” he finished.

“Oh, right.” Jonny lowered his eyes, staring at the table and actually looking ashamed.

“I don't mind,” Chris clarified, “I just thought it was... interesting.”

Jonny opened his mouth the speak, but he was cut off by the entrance of their waitress, there to take their orders. Chris rattled off a bunch of the fancy French food names- it was a French restaurant, after all- and suddenly Jonny became very intimidated. He had never even said so much as “bonjour” in his entire life, and the prospect of having to order something basically in French scared him greatly. For a split second he wondered what possessed him to pick this restaurant to dine in; it wasn't like he had ever thought to go there before with anyone else he had dated.

The waitress turned to Jonny, and he tried to use the same skill Chris had, but he fell short of his own expectations. Chris smiled kindly at the waitress as she turned to leave, and when he went to grab another drink he noticed Jonny had started fidgeting.

“Jonny, what's up?” he asked. Jonny looked up at Chris and blushed.

“I'm just nervous. I've never done this before.”

“What, you've never been on a date before?” Chris looked at Jonny disbelievingly and mockingly laughed a bit. Jonny stared back at him, unamused, and tilted his head to the side.

“Not with a guy,” Jonny said. He quickly brought his hand to his neck and began to scratch fervently.

“It's hardly different than with a girl,” Chris replied, absentmindedly running his finger around the rim of his glass. Jonny stopped the scratching and snorted.

“Like you would know?” Chris raised his eyes and smiled.

“Good point.”

“Anyway, I... I just want to impress you,” Jonny quietly added. Chris reached his arm across the table and laid his hand on Jonny's forearm.

“Jonny, I think I need to impress you far more than you need to impress me.” Jonny kept his eyes down, but he moved his other arm so that he could grab Chris's hand. “I mean, all you really need to do to impress me is sit there and breathe.”

Jonny wasn't entirely convinced, but he decided to at least try to believe Chris's words. He was still really anxious, and probably over-thought everything he was going to say much more than necessary. Chris intuitively picked up on this, but he thought Jonny's behavior was endearing.

The food was not as delicious as it sounded, though it didn't actually sound that great to begin with. But neither Jonny or Chris minded, because they were too busy focusing on each other to pay much attention to the quality of the food.

Once the dinner had been paid for, the two men stepped outside of the restaurant, and Jonny began to head in the direction of his car.

“Wait,” Chris said, gently grabbing Jonny's arm. Jonny cautiously turned around and looked at Chris expectantly. “We should walk around for a bit.”

“Well... OK.” Chris released his hold on the arm which Jonny then lifted and placed around Chris's shoulder. They began to stroll down the sidewalk, Chris with his hands in his pockets as he stared at Jonny and Jonny with his head down, watching the pavement move beneath them.

The sun was setting, its orange glow spreading and covering the earth like a blanket. Suddenly, halfway down the road, Chris began to talk, and kept going on and on until they had circled the entire block once. Jonny never once lifted his head, but he was always smiling at the sound of Chris's voice.

“You're still nervous, aren't you?” Chris asked Jonny as they stopped along the side of Jonny's car. Jonny looked up at him, stared for a few seconds, then shrugged.

“I can't help it.” Trying desperately not to move in any way, Jonny forced himself to make eye contact with Chris for an extended length of time. No longer was Chris's nose of any importance to him; now it was only those bright blue eyes, the same ones that shook him and made him feel safe all at once, that caught his attention.

Without breaking the stare, Chris glided closer to Jonny, took his hand, and the next thing Jonny knew Chris's lips were upon his and everything was all right.

“We can leave now, yeah?” Chris whispered, still less than an inch away from Jonny's face, and Jonny nodded.

He held the door open for Chris, then walked around to the driver side and sat himself in the car. The sound of Chris's buckle clicking into place was the only thing to be heard until the engine roared to life. Then Jonny put on his own seat belt and started to back the car up.

“You know,” Chris said as Jonny pulled out of the parking lot and onto the main road, “if we were the ones getting married, I wouldn't leave you.”

Jonny allowed himself to glimpse briefly at the other man, and he smiled brightly. “Well, that's always good to know.”

And they drove off into the summer night.